That great nemesis of sleep, job satisfaction, and existential happiness is here again. That’s right, it’s MONDAY, the day that we all dread and loathe. Fortunately, that is exactly why the Great Mondaydact Browser Crusher exists – to ensure that your day is as free of pain and full of procrastination as possible. And we’ve got a packed lineup for you today – we’ve got the #BasedTucker, the righteous rants, the fun pics, the memes, the boobage (and, uh, “buttage”, I suppose), the guns, the glory, and the music, all ready and waiting for you.
But first, let’s start with something designed to make you think twice about getting up to anything truly stupid on a Monday. If you’re anything like me, you rather liked the old Judge Dredd comics as a kid – and if you didn’t grow up with them, then I think you probably had a horrid childhood.
But, if you know anything about Dredd, the character, you know that the Sylvester Stallone film was… terrible.
Just… OUCH, man.
The Karl Urban film from ten years ago, on the other hand, was AWESOME. Unlike Stallone, Urban actually tried to understand the character and what he’s all about, and the film-makers tried to make the movie as gritty and realistic as possible. (Wait… it’s REALLY been 10 years?!?!?!)
The result was a powerful, compelling, tight, brilliant movie that genuinely showed a Dredd walking a very fine line between controlled anger and berserker rage:
Just remember – as bad as this Monday is, it’s not as bad as if you were a Judge, assigned to Megacity One.
#BasedTucker is Based
Mar 28, 2022
Mar 29, 2022
Mar 30, 2022
Mar 31, 2022
Apr 1, 2022
Dawn of Battle
The Male Brain has some great comedy to cheer us all up today. We start with what can only be described as “Millennial Humour” – which is to say, this is why Millennials are the worst generation in history:
The Babylon Bee continues its immaculate track record of reporting all of the news before it ever happens:
Solid jj brings back on oldie but goodie:
Cracked explains why wine is a giant scam:
I consume roughly 1.4 bottles of wine every two weeks, so all I can say is that I’m a sucker.
Felix Rex gets serious for a moment and explains the piratical origins of America:
Since it’s been a while since we featured Ryan George around here, let’s fix that minor oversight:
[Yeah. It really was. I watched it in theatres, YEARS ago. It SUCKED.]
Poli-ticking Off
Mark Dice gets serious for a bit to explain the satanry and wizardry of the Grammys:
Bill Whittle and his buddies take on the Pimp-Slap Heard ‘Round the World:
The interesting thing here is that reactions to this Jap-Slap vary around the world. Some – not many – Russians would argue, for instance, that Will Smith defended his woman’s honour. This is a very Russian way of looking at things. They believe that, if you insult someone’s wife, he has every right to smash your face in. It’s one of the things that I like about their culture.
The problem with this argument is that Chris Rock didn’t actually make much of an insult. He didn’t insult Jada Pinkett-Smith for her mediocre career, her loose morals, her cheating, or her stupidity. He didn’t even really mock her illness, which isn’t particularly severe anyhow, and which Jada herself publicly shrugged off.
So, in all honesty, one has to say that Will Smith massively overreacted and proved that he’s essentially just a butt-boy for his wife, who clearly holds his balls in her purse.
Sorry, not sorry, that’s just the truth of things.
Alex Christoforou and his good friend Alexander Mercouris break down the gas-for-rubles strategy on their channel, TheDuran, really rather nicely:
The Russians went live with this policy last week, and so far, at least, no major disruptions have been reported. But the Russians very clearly are not screwing around. They absolutely mean business about this.
They have now implemented a price floor for gold, purchasing at 5,000 RUB per gram on the open market. The current price of gold is around US$62/g. That floor price in rubles would establish a direct and very clear link between the ruble and gold, and would peg the exchange rate against the dollar at about 80 rubles per greenback.
You want to know where the ruble is right now? It’s at roughly 84 per dollar.
In other words, the Russian gambit is working. BRILLIANTLY. They have just created the world’s first and most powerful truly commodity-backed currency, weighted against a basket of goods that include crude oil, natural gas, gold, wheat, diamonds, and precious metals.
If I were you – hell, if I were me – I would be thinking VERY SERIOUSLY about converting savings into precious metals and rubles as soon as possible. The days of USD dominance in the world economy are definitively drawing to a close, and the collapse, when it comes, will be horrific.
Grandpa Grumpface, Andrei Martyanov, offers up geopolitical analysis about the current Banderstan and global situation in his signature style, which is absolutely hilarious to listen to – it’s like listening to your granddad ranting about those damn kids wearing their stupid shorts around their ankles who need to get off the bloody lawn:
China Uncensored points out that the latest Kung Flu lockdowns in Shanghai are likely to cause severe disruptions:
Let’s be very clear about something. China IS going to be the next great power in the east. But the Chinese have huge problems with understanding basic issues of cause and effect. Their entire culture is reactive, not proactive, in a number of critical areas, and they don’t actually plan nearly as long-term as people think they do.
America Uncovered has a new face for one of its programmes, for some reason, and notes that the Banderastan War is likely to cause global food shortages:
Jared Taylor from American Renaissance has a sarcastic take on the latest Bright Idea from the Wokerati:
PJW debugs how the latest operating system updates get sent out to all of the NPCs, every time Thee Current Thing changes:
The lovely and charming Dr. Sam Bailey points out what is becomingly increasingly obvious to anyone paying attention – that HIV is NOT the causal factor for AIDS:
This is not MY claim, I want to make that very clear. The view that HIV does not cause AIDS has been known and understood since the late 1980s, and Dr. Peter Duesberg, one of the world’s best and most knowledgeable virologists, has been making that precise argument for decades. For his trouble, he has been deplatformed and banned from almost every “respectable” outlet. Yet, he is right.
Lord Razor of the Fist Clan declares the superhero flick genre dead and buried:
I think he’s probably right. I haven’t watched a superhero flick in the theatres in, honestly, years. The last really good movie that I watched in a movie theatre was The King’s Man, which was AMAZING – but it bombed at the box office. And I have absolutely ZERO desire to watch any superhero flick, ever, at the theatres again. I didn’t even care about The Batman.
That’s just me, of course, and given my APPALLING taste in movies – and it truly IS awful – I am not representative of any group of customers. (Unless “Ye Grumpye Olde Phartes who really dislike other people and live very boring lives” is a customer demographic, that is.) But I do think that the superhero flick genre is pretty much done – with some exceptions, like that last Spiderman flick, whatever it was called.
Warriors of Faith
The Dizzle takes one of his usual victory laps at the way that he has been able to lead Muzzies away from the Great Heresy:
Dr. Jay Smith from PfanderFilms and his good friend Al Fadi unpack one of the biggest and most problematic differences between the Hafs and Warsh versions of the supposedly eternal and unchanged Koran:
This one truly is a huge issue. The Muzzies have consistently shifted the goal-posts around their failing narrative.
First, they claimed that there is not one verse, line, phrase, word, or even diacritical mark that has ever changed in the history of the Koran.
That was proven conclusively wrong several years ago.
So then they said that those differences were very minor, between all of the (at least) 30 different versions of the Koran, and that none of them make any difference in doctrine, practice, dogma, belief, or tradition.
This is being proven blatantly false even as we watch.
Soon they will probably switch to arguing that it’s all a mystery and nobody really knows the mind of Allah, and that the Koran differences are just an expression of Allah’s inscrutable nature.
It’s going to be a lot of fun to dismantle that too. We’ll see when we get there.
One more thing – anyone who says that Islam is the world’s fastest growing religion, or its strongest, or its most truthful, is lying through his or her teeth on all of those counts. The reality is that the truth about Izzlam is getting out very quickly, and MILLIONS of Muslims are leaving Islam every single year, committing apostasy and abandoning this nonsense.
Al-Fadi from CIRA International and Dr. Jay Smith also destroy the myths surrounding Mecca:
Dr. Frank Turek from Cross Examined tackles the silliness of cultural relativism:
Manly Men of Manliness
Terrence Popp tells it like it is, as always:
Joker from Better Bachelor hammers home the fact that you MUST know a woman’s past thoroughly, and observe her ACTIONS, not her words, when evaluating her as a potential mate:
Burn Paedowood to the Ground
Midnight’s Edge are quite amused at the rapid collapse of the relaunched G4:
Overlord Dicktor Van Doomcock keeps flogging the dead mouse:
Look, Doomcock, WE GET IT, OK? ViacomCBS, Paramount, Warner, the Devil Mouse – they’re ALL evil. Just stop buying their shit and ignore them.
Don’t get me wrong, I like Doomcock’s take on things from time to time, but his endless bitching about how horrible everything is, becomes tiresome after a while. Instead of complaining, create, and make sure that what you create cannot be corrupted.
Gary from Nerdrotic offers his own take on the Jada-Slap:
The Drinker takes absolutely no prisoners with respect to the moral midgets and talentless hacks that think themselves our betters in Hollyweird:
Ryan Kinel thoroughly approves of Tony Rock‘s take on the whole Jada-Slap situation:
Tony has it right. Will Smith got upset because his woman gave him some side-eye, and decided to get all hot and bothered about very little.
Reading Too Much Into Things
Your “Science is F***ING WEIRD” moment of the week:
Your long read of the week is an interview with precious metals analyst Ronan Manly (awesome name, that) who works at BullionStar in Singapore, about how the gold-pegged ruble is going to be a massive game-changer in global economics:
By playing both sides of the equation, i.e. linking the ruble to gold and then linking energy payments to the ruble, the Bank of Russia and the Kremlin are fundamentally altering the entire working assumptions of the global trade system while accelerating change in the global monetary system. This wall of buyers in search of physical gold to pay for real commodities could certainly torpedo and blow up the paper gold markets of the LBMA and COMEX.
The fixed peg between the ruble and gold puts a floor on the RUB/USD rate but also a quasi-floor on the US dollar gold price. But beyond this, the linking of gold to energy payments is the main event. While increased demand for rubles should continue to strengthen the RUB/USD rate and show up as a higher gold price, due to the fixed ruble – gold linkage, if Russia begins to accept gold directly as a payment for oil, then this would be a new paradigm shift for the gold price as it would link the oil price directly to the gold price.
For example, Russia could start by specifying that it will now accept 1 gram of gold per barrel of oil. It doesnโt have to be 1 gram but would have to be a discounted offer to the current crude benchmark price so as to promote take up, e.g. 1.2 grams per barrel. Buyers would then scramble to buy physical gold to pay for Russian oil exports, which in turn would create huge strains in the paper gold markets of London and New York where the entire โgold priceโ discovery is based on synthetic and fractionally-backed cash-settled unallocated โgoldโ and gold price โderivatives.
There is much more to the interview, and it is well worth reading in full. The simple version is that a fully commodity-backed ruble, which is what we now have, is indeed going to revolutionise global economics. It will globalise the ruble and turn it into a true reserve currency for international trade. And the result will be a substantial reduction of the USD’s purchasing power and global standing.
Linkage is good for you:
- Mike Whitney does his usual Q&A dialogue on the question of whether the Neo-Tsar might use nukes to get his way in the Banderastan War – the short version is that this is pure projection on the West’s part;
- Pat “Mr. Paleoconservative” Buchanan wonders whether the Fake President’s use of “insult diplomacy” is actually particularly effective (tl;dr version – NO IT BLOODY ISN’T);
- The great Dr. Ron Paul analyses the pile of horripilation that was Fake President Greenscreen McNappyFace’s latest walking talking disaster tour in Europe;
- I tell you what, the Banderastanis sure have epic chutzpah – they are demanding that US$300 BILLION in confiscated Russian foreign exchange reserves should be given to them, for reconstruction funds;
- Even the foreign policy establishment in PommieBastardLande is finally admitting that they might have cocked up a bit with those sanctions;
- Nebojsa Malic exposes the ongoing attempts by the Western whorenalists to whitewash the involvement of real Ukronazis in the Banderastan War, and points out why we should not let them get away with it;
- Does anyone else think that it’s a remarkable coincidence that the Pentaloons want to scrap dozens of old F-22s – THE BEST 5G fighter jet ever made – right after the Russians demonstrated their air defence abilities in Banderastan?;
- Remember that Turducken Plane that crashed into the South China Sea at the hands of the very first female F-35 pilot in the navy? The Navy finally managed to recover it, a couple of weeks back, no doubt to their great relief;
- While we’re on the subject of pointless boondoggles, the Navy plans to retool its entire infrastructure, because its current fleet of supercarriers and Turduckens simply will not be enough to take on China;
- The Dark Herald offers up his own opinion as to whether the Bitch-Slap Heard Round the World was real or fake – he reckons the slap was real, but the outrage that motivated it was fake, and I’m inclined to agree with him;
- Eugene Gant and his readers offer up some rather pungent thoughts on the influx of Indian CEOs controlling American companies – knowing Indians as I do, all I can tell you is that letting Indians run anything non-Indian is a HUGE mistake;
- The Chinese keep wanting the rest of us to believe that they have the Coof under control over in their country – evidence on the ground suggests distinctly otherwise;
- Female teaching assistant, age 21, bangs male student, age 15, while arguing that age is just a number – if we’d had TAs like that in high school, I think more of us boys would have paid FAR more attention in maths class…;
- Robert Bridge notes that the Bitch Slap Heard Round the World is merely another symptom of the sheer hypocrisy and mendacity of the woke mob’s Hollyweird cancel culture, where even mild jokes are no longer safe;
And some more from Dawn Pine:
- The UN continues to pontificate itself into complete irrelevance with its latest “5-Year action plan” for “climate change” – better known to you and me as “farting cows”;
- The Babylon Bee continues to report the news before it ever happens, noting that Fraudci is about to win the “Best Actor” Oscar – he should also win the “Best Villain” category, since he plays both parts so well;
- Everyone’s favourite train-smash woman, Katie Price, got dumped by her latest boy-toy, and all that we can ask is, “what the hell took him so bloody long to get around to ditching her ugly plastic ass?!?!?!”;
- In a world plainly gone completely mad, we need a bit of feel-good news from time to time, so here’s some – Gordon Ramsay (yeah, THAT guy) sent one of his chefs, at special request, to help out in a school cafeteria;
- Indians clearly learned from their former British masters about the “virtues” of colonialism, and are busy putting those lessons to good use in Papua New Guinea with carbon credits;
- This article by Andrew Anglin might be a bit hyperbolic, but honestly, it’s worth the price of admission just to watch the video clip at the very beginning, which is more Indian than butter chicken;
- The story about the legendary Bruce Willis stepping away from acting, due to aphasia, is just awful – we dedicated a Mondaydact Browser Smasher to him just a couple of weeks ago, this one definitely hurts;
MUH RUSHIAN KAHLOOOOOZHUN!!!
The Neo-Tsar has seriously upped the ante in the high-stakes, high-powered gamble against the West, by requiring unfriendly nations to pay in rubles:
Those Who Fail To Learn From History…
History lessons of the week:
Your Great Man of the Week is Henry V:
He truly was a great king. If you’ve ever watched the adaptation by Kenneth Brannagh of the Shakespeare play, you’ll see just how great his story was.
HALO Nation
SameToken explains the miracle of the MJOLNIR armour:
And now let’s watch slayergod Mint Blitz do his thing:
That’s Not Gone Well…
Wazzocks gonna wazzock:
Kitchen Nightmares with the Angry Scot:
Comedy hour:
Pictionary, Pulchritude, Pew-Pews
Headlines of the week indicate that everything bad is due to aliens:
Your “Zombie Apocalypse” moment of the week:
Your “Just Look at America’s President” moment of the week:
Your “Company Expenses” moment of the week:
Having worked on Wall Street for years, I can tell you honestly that the story behind that headline is considerably more tame than what the banksters used to do back in the Good Old Days.
I literally can’t craption this next one:
Your “Death Becomes Her” moment of the week:
This is what happens when you put SJWs in charge of anything:
I’m definitely calling bullshit on this one:
This next one ain’t right, but it’s still bloody hilarious:
Animal Planet
Your aminules are adorkable moment of the week:
And also your animals are absolute DICKS moment of the week, to balance things out:
The Lords of Steel
Gym beast
Wise Uncle Chael the American Gangster offers an intriguing take on the true costs of putting on 4oz gloves and smashing the shit out of other people – and getting your own face smashed in:
Jesus loves knockouts:
Icecapades
Shufflin’ keeps things groovin’:
The Lords of Steel
Hot Totty
OK, chaps, finally we get to the bit that you’re actually interested in – the Instathot to get the week off to the right start. This is Irina Sivalnaya (ะัะธะฝะฐ ะกะธะฒะฐะปัะฝะฐั), age roughly 26, from Dnepr, Ukraine. She studied in Kiev and now lives there – well, maybe not NOW now, obviously, given that the city is under siege by the Russians and thousands of its residents have fled. She’s a photo model – with an OnlySimps account… so you know what that means.
And that’s all, folks. Stop messing about and get back to work.
0 Comments