Boys, there ain’t no gettin’ past the fact that Mondays muddapuckin’ SUCK.
But they must suck harder than a freakin’ vacuum cleaner if you live in Hollyweird.
That’s the only way that I can explain this particular bit of moonbattery, which involves a bunch of celebritards speaking slowly and seriously about how there absolutely was Russian KAHLOOOOOZHUN!!! in the 2016 election of His Most Benevolent Astral Majesty, the God-Emperor of Mankind, Donaldus Triumphus Magnus:
Man, the years have not been kind to Robert De Niro. Well, that, and his upcoming divorce, which will undoubtedly result in his wallet being yanked out through whatever is left of his genitals.
Honestly, what is wrong with these people?!? They have all, to a person, gone completely off their rockers. It’s like Hollyweird is this strange reality-distorting field where you literally cannot see the truth even when it smashes you in the teeth with a folding chair.
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Speaking of the God-Emperor – it is absolutely clear that he is having a blast on the campaign trail:
At this rate, he’s going to run away with the election in a true Trumpslide.
And yes, I know, he’s actually been quite disappointing on a number of fronts in 2019. I know quite a few of you have lost faith with him because of that.
My answer to that is: remember that he is basically a Boomer civic nationalist. He’s not a true nationalist. And he is hamstrung by a Democrat House that hates him, a Republicuck Senate that doesn’t have more than ten pairs of testicles among 56 Senators, and an entire Administration that wants to destroy him.
That’s before we get to the left-wing media, which wants to see him thrown into the deepest, darkest dungeon, whipped, flayed, and finally eaten by bears – and makes absolutely no secret of this anymore.
With all of that against him, he has still been by far the best President since St. Reagan of the Right – and is in many ways even better than his illustrious predecessor.
I do agree with Mr. Gutfeld. The guy who’s having the most fun on the campaign trail is quite likely to win here. And there is no question that President Trump – God bless him! – is having an absolute laff riot.
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Simon Sinek has some more useful thoughts to add about Shrillennials and how generally useless they are:
A lot of that was reheated leftovers, I admit, but he does have some very useful points to make about how utterly unprepared the Shrillennial Generation is for modernity.
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The Lizard People are in full charge now – and deepfake video technology will both give them even more power, and give us the ability and tools necessary to destroy them:
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Dave from Blue Collar Logic came up with a really beautiful Father’s Day tribute:
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Here is another great Father’s Day story – from the other end of the spectrum, with HUGE amounts of swearing. I mean, it is Popp, and he is an Army Ranger and a Green Beret and a former 1st Sergeant in God’s Own Army, so, y’know, what the f*** do you expect…
Oh, and don’t watch this at work with the sound cranked up:
Don’t say I didn’t f***in’ warn you.
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Sarah Huckabee-Sanders has stepped down from the role of Press Secretary for the God-Emperor, Donaldus Triumphus Magnus. The whorenalist corps has reacted with typical class and grace to that news:
I don’t mind the fact that President Trump routinely destroys the lying liars of the fake news media in person on his own now, but it was sometimes quite good fun to watch his Press Secretary treating the press corps with a mixture of amused contempt and outright sarcasm.
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It says a lot about the state of the Union when the First Lady of the United States – who is not herself born American, but is a stunningly beautiful woman nonetheless – gets criticised for reading out the Lord’s Prayer in public:
That was 2 years ago. Things have simply gotten way worse since then.
There is a lot wrong with what Mr. Hannity said too. There is no such thing as “Judaeo-Christian” values. The entire idea is utter nonsense, and the sooner that the Right abandons this malicious garbage, the better off we will all be.
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Now here is a video that came as something of a surprise to me. Apparently Uncle Sam’s Misguided Children – God bless ’em! – genuinely love the V-22 Osprey, the crazy and brilliant tilt-rotor aircraft that can operate as both a helicopter and a fixed-wing transport:
This, despite the fact that there are at least 40 deaths and some serious crashes noted in the Osprey’s service history.
Well, in the end, the only relevant metric probably is, in fact, what the men who use the actual equipment think of it. And if the Marines like it and think it increases their fighting effectiveness… who am I to question them?
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Here is some more good stuff for the air nerds (like me):
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Do not fall for the ploys of tradthots and grifters in the CONservative movement, no matter how nice their tits and asses might be:
The same applies to the Republican Party’s favourite Token Black Girl of the Month, Candace Owens:
To understand how conservatives across college campuses and Fox News hosts embraced a woman who changes opinions like most people change underwear, you have to understand the birth of Social Autopsy, the public catalogue of people who made the grave error of posting a problematic comment.
Candace launched Social Autopsy in 2016, after dropping out of college, a brief stint of working at Vogue magazine (yes, with those awful globalists!), a gig as an assistant at a private equity firm, and a failed founding of an editorial website which carried such high-minded and moral articles as ‘I Think Affairs Are Romantic’ and ‘I’m So Sorry Ladies, But We Can NEVER Stop Faking the Orgasm.’ The warring tribes of left and right both vehemently opposed Social Autopsy at the start. As New York magazine’s Jesse Singal wrote, ‘a rare degree of unity was achieved between various opposing factions in the endless internet culture wars,’ and the self-identified liberal Owens found herself once again at the fringes.
Following a brief break from the spotlight, she suddenly found herself ‘redpilled’ (that’s the right-wing version of the Awokening). Candace re-emerged on YouTube some months later, rebranding not just as a conservative, but specifically as a Trump devotee. Bite-sized, sub-10 minute videos such as ‘Mom, Dad….I’m a conservative.’ and ‘How to Escape the Democrat Plantation (an easy guide).’ accrued hundreds of thousands of views overnight. The vloggable format made sense. Candace is confident, attractive, poised, and black.
From my perspective, a simple rule applies for women who claim to want the TRADLYFE!!! and make money from it:
See whether they have skin in the game.
Let’s take Brittany Pettibone, for instance. Like Lauren Southern, she is young, beautiful, confident, and smart. Like Ms. Southern, she has been banned from at least one country in the West and threatened with physical violence and death many times over. Unlike Lauren Southern, she is engaged to a European identitarian – she might actually be married now – and, as far as I know, doesn’t have a history of posting cosplay routines of herself on her Instagram page.
Or take a certain Blonde in the Belly of the Beast, whose YouTube videos I often embed and link to. She’s married to a US Marine, lives in the suburbs somewhere in the western USA, and evidently takes great pride in being a happy homemaker. Good for her.
Or take NollaGirl504, another conservative female YouTuber. She has been married for at least 11 years, has two children, and while her miscegenation might turn off a lot of the purists in the trad crowd, she walks the talk about living a traditionalist life.
There are female YouTubers out there who walk the talk. Always exercise caution when dealing with women who claim to be traditionalists; assume tradthot until proven otherwise. But, they do exist, and once they’ve shown a track record of living up to their words, they should be accepted, cautiously, as allies.
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The God-Emperor’s BIG BEYOOOTIFULLL WALL!!! doesn’t appear to be going anywhere fast, which is a huge electoral liability for him. But – make no mistake, he is making progress on the border:
That is proof, right there, if any were needed, that tariffs work as weapons of economic and political warfare.
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Modernism is failing in Europe, very clearly and very badly:
DEUS VULT, my brothers!!!
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The Big Bear points out some hard truths about the Fake Right:
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We came THISCLOSE to seeing the dying and collapsing American empire go to war with Iran, which would have been an absolute and utter disaster. It appears that the God-Emperor saw sense, finally, at the very last moment, and called off a major airstrike against Iran that would have been entirely out of proportion with the Iranians shooting down one drone.
It would appear that the God-Emperor is directly at war with elements of his own Administration, which is not surprising.
One of his most valuable and useful allies in that fight has to be #BasedTucker:
It’s funny… I was praying just a day or two before the airstrike was averted, for Donald Trump himself, that he would govern well and avoid insane ideas. And here we are a few days later, and President Trump single-handedly pulled the USA back from an incredibly stupid and devastating war with a power that could and likely would wipe out at least one carrier battle group.
I’m not saying that my prayers had that much effect. I’m not nearly a good enough person to have the Almighty’s ear like that. But, in case anyone doubts the power of prayer… well, there you go.
Now, if only the Almighty would get on with striking down the neoclowns with bolts of lightning and boils and sores, we might get somewhere…
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#BasedTucker, again, explains why Commiefornia is such a shithole state these days:
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Your “LOLWUT MUH RUSSIA” story of the week:
A study by Russian scientists to examine the effects of space exploration on human sperm production has hit an unforeseen snag – cosmonauts are refusing to collect the necessary material.
The question of mankind’s ability to safely navigate space and survive longer exploratory missions without serious long-term health implications is at the heart of ongoing research into broadening our knowledge away from our home planet.
However, the effects of space travel on one key component in the creation of human life is likely to continue a mystery for the time being, as Russian cosmonauts are refusing to collect semen samples during their space missions.
Irina Ogneva, head of the cell biophysics laboratory at the Institute of Biomedical Problems of the Russian Academy of Sciences, told RIA Novosti that her team wants to study spermatogenesis in astronauts before, during and after their spaceflights – and it’s the ‘during’ leg of the voyage that’s presenting the problem.
The prospect of obtaining the samples in space mission conditions “causes everyone to smile and reject,” Ogneva explained, adding: “There are no cosmonauts who want to.”
Also:
That feel when… your own cosmonauts won’t jack off for the Motherland…
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Thots gonna thot:
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Our Blue Collar buddies have an interesting take on the reason why His Beneficent Astral Majesty, the God-Emperor Donaldus Triumphus Magnus, has such a powerful connection with the American people:
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The Big Bang Theory is one of those weird shows which I know are truly awful and terrible, but cannot resist hate-watching, somehow, because of just how unbelievably obnoxious Sheldon Cooper is:
And just in case you needed more evidence that Sheldon Cooper is TV’s most annoyingly idiotic prat ever:
Good LORD, but that character is utterly insufferable…
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From the ridiculous to the sublime – here is an instrumental cover of “Aces High” by IRON MAIDEN, performed by Nita Strauss’s band with David Ellefson of MEGADETH on bass:
Now, that was pretty damn good, I’ll admit – but it’s still nowhere close to the sheer balls-out brilliance of the original. I don’t care how good Nita is as a guitarist, she still can’t match Dave Murray and Adrian Smith for tone and smoothness.
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Richard Hammond once opened his mouth to change feet:
And more of the same from the blokiest blokes ever to bloke across a TV screen:
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Everyone’s favourite PT goes about showing you how you can gross out your girlfriend or wife by cracking your own back:
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Your weekly dose of awwww…:
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Related – who says wardogs are always scary? They certainly aren’t when celebrating World Yoga Day – whatever the hell that means:
Now THAT’S how you do a downward dog!
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Pics, guns, and boobs time!!!
Your head-scratching headlines of the week go here, and as usual Floriduh is really overachieving:
I have readers who live in Florida. All I can say is…
What the hell do you people smoke down there, man?!?!?
Then again, the global headquarters of the Church of Scientology are located in Clearwater, near St. Petersburg. This surely tips Florida’s Crazy Quotient way over the redlines.
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Your dog of the week is the Alaskan Malamute:
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Time for some gym fails – cover your eyes, boys:
I thought the blonde who had to bail out of that failed re-rack did a pretty good job of making light of the situation, actually.
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And now here is your gym beast to wipe away those fails – in the form of the World’s Strongest Man 2019, Martins Licis:
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Here is a fascinating breakdown of how some of the best and most unorthodox strikers in the world were defeated by highly intelligent and tactically brilliant opponents who studied their techniques and came up with excellent counters:
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Buakaw Banchamek gets a lot of props and respect from this blog because of his insane workout regimen, brutal power, blinding explosive speed, and absolutely unbreakable physique – as well as the fact that, well, he looks and acts like a human Terminator in the ring.
But, on the other end of the spectrum, we have Saenchai, a true artist of the Art of Eight Limbs, whose style could not possibly be more different from Buakaw’s.
Where Buakaw is methodical, lethal, and relentless, Saenchai is a wily, slippery, brilliant tactician. Where Buakaw overpowers you, Saenchai deceives you. And where Buakaw simply marches you down with overwhelming pressure, Saenchai head-fakes you into making mistakes and then knocks your front teeth out when you’re looking the wrong way:
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Oh, all right, I might as well show a clip of Buakaw too:
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Actually… while Buakaw makes it a policy not to fight Thai fighters, at least at this phase in his career – for some reason which I can’t figure out, and I know it has nothing to do with cowardice given his long and illustrious CV of fighting some of the biggest and hardest hitters in the world – there does exist footage of the two of them messing around and doing some light sparring for a fan expo:
Don’t let the protective gear fool you. Neither of those guys understands the meaning of pain. Their bodies have been so thoroughly conditioned to both absorb and dish out massive amounts of punishment that they cannot really feel the impacts of bone on bone.
The pads are just there to show everyone that it’s all in good fun and to avoid leaving any bruising.
By the way… if you’ve never seen footage of Buakaw training, then you’re missing something both extraordinary and absolutely terrifying:
He’s actually hunting down his training partner, just to beat the shit out of him some more. You can actually see his training partner literally begging for mercy at the end.
That is exactly why I call him a Human Terminator.
Fortunately, he’s only utterly terrifying about 99% of the time. There are moments when he trains the kids to fight:
Actually… come to think of it… an army of mini-Buakaws running around is not exactly a rosy scenario for the rest of us.
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#AreYouMetal?
I do like myself some good old-fashioned doom metal…
Always nice to see a throwback to old-school early-80’s speed and thrash metal. Sounds a hell of a lot like OVERKILL.
And now for the correct version of “Aces High”, performed by THE GREATEST BAND OF ALL TIME – also known as IRON MAIDEN:
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Instathot time, and this girl is definitely a highly enhanced example of the breed. Her name is Katya and she is originally from Moscow – and no, I don’t know her personally.
I have seen a picture of her before she got all of her, um, work done, and she looks completely different now to what she did back when she was a teenager. For one thing, back then, she didn’t have black hair, she was a brunette. These days she is more plastic than a Barbie, but hey, that’s on her.
Good luck getting through your Monday, boys.
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