So we all managed to survive the weekend – just about – and Drumpf just pulled off a pretty impressive TACO play today. I suppose we should all be thankful for that – and, indeed, it is a VERY GOOD THING that he backed off on his frankly unhinged threat to bomb Iran’s power plants. The Persians responded by basically releasing a list of targets across the Arab Gulf states, which included desalination plants and power stations, plus a long list of Big Tech data centres.
That, apparently, was enough to set off the US bond market, as Treasury yields on the 10Y bond spiked above 4.5%. Once this happens, it is a giant screaming red light in the financial markets, signalling impending doom, and even the God-Emperor cannot ignore that.
I have a strong suspicion that one of the very few adults left anywhere in the Administration might have joggled his elbow and told him quietly to knock that shit off, which is why he did.
At any rate, at least things have calmed down, slightly, but they will not stay that way for long. So let us try to wipe Monday off our shoes with another Great Mondaydact Browser Splitter.
This week, we take a look at one of my favourite things to hate – the PANDA BEAR, which I have long argued should simply go extinct. And when you look at the details, frankly, it is not hard to see why:
#BasedTucker is Based
Dawn of Battle
The Male Brain gets us going for the week:
Mind-Expanding Drugs
Death Smiles At Us All…
Culture Beats
Warriors of Faith
Manly Men of Manliness
Bad Medicine
Veteransโ Day
Judgeโs Ruling
MUH RUSHIAN KAHLOOOOOOOZHUN!!!
ะะพะฒัะน-ะฆะฐัั ะัะธะบะฐะทัะฒะฐะตั
ะัะพัะตััะพั ะัะพะฒะบะธะฝ ะฃัะธั
ะะตะด ะกะฒะฐัะปะธะฒัะน ะะพะฒะพัะธั!
ะัะดั ะกัะฐั ะะฑัััะฝัะตั
ะ ัััะบะธะต ะััะถะธะต
ะ ัััะบะฐั ะะธะทะฝั
Polonium
Timeo Danaos Et Donna Ferentesโฆ
Burn Paedowood to the Ground
HALO Nation
BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!!!
Big Boyz Toyz
No, Iran DID NOT start it, the Israelis and the Americans did. And now they are shitting their pants as the Iranians rain death down upon them.
Oh No! Anywayโฆ
Reading Too Much Into Things
Linkage is good for you:
- Dmitryi Trenin does his best to decipher just what the hell Drumpf is doing with his approach to power politics;
- Timofey Bordachyev explains how Drumpfโs Disaster has exposed the hard limits of American power;
- Fyodor Lukyanov points to the fracture points in the Western alliance exposed by Ornj Boiโs crazy gambit;
- Murad Sadygadze shows why the crisis in the Gulf is now impossible to contain after the insane actions of the Izzraelis and the Ameribros;
- Rachel Marsden notes that the Euroweenies are getting to grips with their weird BDSM fetish when dealing with the Ameribros โ though not very well;
- Apparently, the Russians delivered nearly a billion dollarsโ worth of weapons to the Iranians โ which may help explain why the FUSA and Izzrael are suddenly backing off;
- And the Persians appear to have put at least some of those weapons to good use โ they ploinked an F-35 Joint Strike Flying Piano Morris Marina Turducken with a heatseeker;
- It turns out that Chuck Norris was a hero to the Russians as well as the Americans, back in the day โ mostly because of his epic beard;
- After upgrading the Large Hadron Collider, the Swiss Cheeses running the thing have apparently discovered a new particle;
- These days, with modern phone batteries, it is actually generally just fine to keep your phone charging overnight;
And some more from Dawn Pine:
- Travelling TO Dubai these days means you basically get an entire jet to yourself, which is not a bad experience at all, really;
- Hereโs something of a first โ a startup sues its own CEO for stealing company emails and lying about his qualifications;
- European fertility rates are falling faster and further โ it is only a matter of time before the Euroweenies either become Muslim slaves, OR finally force-breed their women;
- Peter Thiel gets a lot of crap for many reasons, but Iโm not sure he is entirely wrong about getting fellow gazillionaires to abandon this silly โgiving pledgeโ thing;
- Speaking of idiot gazillionaires โ one of the midwit founders of Goolag has spent millions to fight against a tax on billionaires, even though he is himself a progressive neoliberal twit;
- Researchers have found one of three vital pages from the โArchimedes Manuscriptโ after doing, effectively, a little spring cleaning;
- The next series of Graham Hancockโs Ancient Apocalypse show really ought to be filmed in Israel โ assuming the Yids survive the war they have brought on themselves, that is;
- Gen-Z are discovering that if you give everyone an A, then that devalues the entire premium that comes from getting an A โ which is a natural form of inflation, really;
- Abominable Intelligence is not the destroyer of humanity โ it is merely a reflection of our own failures;
Comedy Hour
Meme Warfare
We begin with some dank memes from The Male Brain:
- It’s the C. There is never a silent S in the beginning of a word
- It’s dirty. Just because it touched the floor doesn’t clean it up
- Smell your nose and your feet and you’ll figure it out. Also – our feet also run
- It’s not in English. It’s from Nahuatl (Aztec)
- They read each other’s minds. Just because you read someone’s mind doesn’t mean you have absorbed it completely
- Answer from the AI: “In the world of puns and dad jokes, yes, you are telling the truth about lying. However, in formal logic, if you say “I am lying” and you mean it in the sense of “I am telling a falsehood,” the universe usually implodes because if the statement is true, it must be false, and if it’s false, it must be true.
But since youโre just in bed, the only thing “imploding” is probably your pillows. You are technically being 100% honest about your horizontal status.”
You are all welcome
And now, as LRFotS RobertW likes to say:
Real Men Watch REAL Sports
REPS FOR JESUS!!!
Ass-Kicking of the Eight Limbs
They See Me Rollinโ…
JUST BLEED!!!
Facefisted
Gymtardery
Animal Planet
Pawsitivity
Bestest Frens
Golden Doofuses
German Shedders
Derpskies
Wolftime
Horse Sense
Cattitude
Cat Against Humanity
Murder Machines
Hootenannies
Palate Cleansers
Axe Me Anything
Knives Out
Stabbity
Forgemaster
Woodshop
Drumlines
Guitar Heroics
MOAR DAKKA!!!
Mambo Italiano
It’s her smile that gets me, every single time. That is TRUE wife material, right there. She loves cooking, and she loves doing things for her husband and family.
Lads, if you find a woman like that, pump her FULL TO THE BRIM with babies and treat her well.
Lunch Break
Omakase
DORINKU!!!
Bullshido Breakdown
Daddyโs Girl
Jump-Starts
Gingervitis Injections
Livinโ in the Land of the Metal Gods
Letโs get down with some classic melodic Swedish death metal, by way of IN FLAMES:
A lot of people hate on Reroute to Remain, and with VERY good reason, but that last song is one of about three good ones from that album. Unfortunately, the rest of it is SHITE.
Rock Out With Your Glock Out
Thot Shots
Finally, here are your Instathots to get the week off to a suitably silly start. Happy Monday, all.
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