Once more, His Most Illustrious, Noble, August, Benevolent, and Legendary Celestial Majesty, the God-Emperor of Mankind, Donaldus Triumphus Magnus Astra, the First of His Name, the Lion of Midnight, may the Lord bless him and preserve him, shows us that anything is possible when you are the Chaddest of Chads ever to Chad across a stage – yea, verily, even unto the point where raccoons in the White House lawn are attacking reporters:
A gang of raccoons attacked journalists outside the White House, with one of the trash pandas allegedly grabbing a photographer and a correspondent. Are they President Trump’s anti-media stormtroopers, people on Twitter ask.
A raccoon “attacked multiple news crews” on the North Lawn of the White House on Monday morning, CBS journalist Paula Reid reported on Twitter. One of the critters “allegedly grabbed [the] pant leg of a photographer & then a correspondent before being fended off.”
According to Reid, White House staff reached out to the US General Services Administration, presumably so the raccoons could be chased away.
Reid’s tweet quickly went viral, with the Twitter #Resistance suggesting that the raccoons showed up at the White House to “clear out the trash” and evict President Trump. However, with Trump’s distaste for the liberal media well known, others joked that the curious creatures must surely have been ordered to attack the reporters.
I’ve never seen a raccoon outside of a zoo myself, so I have no idea what they are really like, but I am given to understand by my Southron readers that they are a flaming nuisance and deserve little better than to be shot on sight. Or are they talking about possums? I never could quite tell.
Anyway, I wholeheartedly approve of the fact that the Imperial Palace is evidently guarded by attack raccoons trained to fend off the never-to-be-sufficiently-cursed whorenalists of the lying (((media))). Honestly, given their sheer mendacity, stupidity, and downright evil actions at this point, I’m shocked that the God-Emperor even bothers talking with them anymore. He really should just start holding trials for treasonous conduct.
I realise that this would immediately cause shrill screams from the presstitutes about “MUH FIRST AMENDMENT!!!”, but I have very little patience for those arguments right now. The First Amendment was always intended to protect the freedom of the press from persecution by government, that is true – but it was NEVER intended to absolve the press from the responsibility to report the truth and to hold government accountable for its actions.
That responsibility and accountability is entirely missing from the modren (((media))). Instead of doing their damn JOBS and reporting on the facts, the (((media))) nowadays has turned itself into an activist wing of the Daemoncrat Party.
I have argued since pretty much the inception of this blog, all the way back in 2013 – ah, those were simpler times! – that rights and responsibilities MUST be equal. This passage from the greatest military sci-fi novel of all time nicely illustrates the nature of the balance involved:
“But this universe consists of paired dualities. What is the converse of authority? Mr. Rico.”
He had picked one I could answer. “Responsibility, sir”.
“Applause. Both for practical reasons and for mathematically verifiable moral reasons, authority and responsibility must be equal – else a balancing takes place as surely as current flows between points of unequal potential. To permit irresponsible authority is to sow disaster; to hold a man responsible for anything he does not control is to behave with blind idiocy.
— Maj. Reid during a lecture in History & Moral Philosophy, from STARSHIP TROOPERS by Robert A. Heinlein, p. 234, 1958
The mainstream (((media))) in much of the Western world has already abdicated its responsibilities and refused to do its damn job. The situation is so smelly with American media right now that I barely consume it – most of my knowledge of politics and current events in the USA comes primarily from Breitbart, which is then heavily supplemented by the UK’s The Daily Mail (a tabloid, with tabloid-quality reporting) and foreign outlets like RT, The Moscow Times, and dissident media such as The Unz Review, Taki’s Magazine, and various other opinion-driven sites.
This is not how it was meant to be. I grew up consuming a steady diet of propaganda masquerading as news from places lik the BBC, CNN, The International Herald Tribune, The Wall Street Journal, and other sources. Today I reject them all completely because of just how utterly disreputable and pathetic they have become.
If the reporters from those so-called “news” organisations were all lined up and SHOT for treason tonight, I would not shed so much as a single tear. At this point, they really deserve what they get.
And if they happen to get bitten by the White House’s special attack raccoons, and therefore have to get rabies shots that stop them all from sitting down comfortably for a week… well:
9 Comments
Possums are good and dumb so can be a little annoying. They eat ticks and other insects. Trash pandas are smart and fearless so can either be nice pets or terrible nuisances that destroy your siding.
“Trash pandas” – yep, that’s the name for them that I had forgotten ))
I do miss the USA.
Flying Piano fall down go boom
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u19R0zfusiQ
That’s going straight onto the blog, thank you very much.
I’m quite surprised to see that no major news outlets seem to have picked this up.
“The Press” is the act of putting words on paper, not a class of humans.
Executing a member of the self-proclaimed fifth estate because they choose to lie is a violation of state law, NOT the constitution.
Morally, even with an Oath to protect the constitution, it is no more unethical than dropping someone who uses his gun to become your dictator.
There is no such thing as ‘the freedom of expression’. There is only the freedom of speech and the freedom to write words and distribute them. And you have no more protection from the consequences of your use of the right than you are protected from the consequences of using your right to bear arms to kill an innocent.
Stupid conservatives seem to have forgotten that, and liberals and anarchists have tried to corrupt it from the very beginning.
That is entirely correct. Rights and responsibilities MUST be balanced. In America people have the right to say what is on their mind – and that is a very precious and important right. But they always seem to forget that this right comes with a cost, a responsibility, which offsets that right and must be weighed against the use of that right.
And ultimately, people must live with the consequences of using their rights.
This blog is a great example. I can’t write what I do under my own name because I know the cost will be far higher than I can pay. So I write under a pseudonym. The things that I write and say are heretical and horrifying to a lot of people, and others would pay a high price simply for knowing me if I were to write under my real name. So I take steps to protect those people.
My rights are real, but they do not come without responsibilities.
There is no such thing as a completely free right to do anything. The men who created America understood this very well. That understanding seemed to permeate the American spirit right up to, oh, about the 1950s. Since then, it seems as though America has steadily forgotten this basic fact of life.
Raccoons are scavengers. They don’t usually attack unless they feel cornered. They are a supreme pain in the ass for property owners and yes, should be shot on sight.
Sincerely,
Man from The Midwestern United States
Any recommended calibres for doing the job? Asking for a friend ))
I usually just use a .22 with standard varminting rounds. Good enough for foxes, coons, and groundhogs, although I scale up to a 30.30 for feral dogs, Antifa, and other large vermin.
Just so long as you are a decent shot. some prefer a 20 gauge shotgun, but you have to get a bit closer, and I am not that stealthy.