“We are Forerunners. Guardians of all that exists. The roots of the Galaxy have grown deep under our careful tending. Where there is life, the wisdom of our countless generations has saturated the soil. Our strength is a luminous sun, towards which all intelligence blossoms… And the impervious shelter, beneath which it has prospered.”

Monday morning media manhandling

by | Aug 12, 2019 | Mondays, Uncategorized | 1 comment

Mother of God, it’s Monday again. Please, please can we be done with it already?!?

Of course, if your name started with “J”, and ended with “effrey Epstein”, then you aren’t around to greet this particular Monday – not that too many of us are very unhappy about this, mind you. As far as I’m concerned, death is too good a penalty for paedophiles. I just wish that he had been around to sing like a jailbird about certain people whose last name starts with a “C” and ends in “linton”.

Anyway, if you’re wondering about the title, yes, I realise that I’m going to get smacked with a couple of homo-suspicion points for it, but it’s actually in direct reference to what is done to the media in the first video of our usual epic linkage and shitposting segment for today.

Which is to say – here is Colion Noir dropping some serious truth bombs right over the (((media))), and schooling them hard in the process:

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Given the utter clown-car crash that is the Daemoncratic field of Presidential candidates these days, it is worth remembering what life was like back in the days when actual debates of actual substance took place – and nobody was better at those debates than a certain Ronald Wilson Reagan, also known in these pages as Reagan Magnus, St. Reagan of the Right, and, of course, PRESIDENT BAMF:

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Have you ever wondered how to get the Grim Reaper to get drunk?

Terry Pratchett apparently did:

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Here’s a classic clip from The Onion concerning the horrific effects of the preemptive use of The Hilldebeast:

Damn, but that shit is funny.

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Trolling, Bugs Bunny style:

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Scientology – NOT EVEN ONCE, bro:

The real secret about Scientology is its Master Race agenda that seeks nothing less than world conquest via ethnic cleansing and taking over the political, legal, educational, and mental health systems of the world.



What Scientology actually is at its core is a Master Race Cult bent upon world domination.



What the general public does not know is that the Master Race Cult of Scientology calls for a genocide of anyone 2.0 or below on the Scientology tone scale. That is what L. Ron Hubbard wrote and we discuss it in this article.

I know more than I would like to about both Dianetics and Scientology. My contempt for both is considerable – but while Dianetics was actually rooted in some ideas that do, in fact, work, and can be proven to work when tested empirically, Scientology is simply nuttier than a Christmas cake.

The money quote is from the Head Fruitcake himself, Lafayette Ron Hubbard, who was given to epic delusions of grandeur and took every opportunity that he could to make himself sound bigger and more impressive in terms of his life accomplishments than he really was:

The reasonable man quite ordinarily overlooks the fact that people from 2.0 down have no traffic with reason and cannot be reasoned with as one would reason with a 3.0. There are only two answers for the handling of people from 2.0 down on the tone scale , neither one of which has anything to do with reasoning with them or listening to their justification of their acts. The first is to raise them on the tone scale by un-enturbulating [sic] some of their theta [sic] by any one of the three valid processes . The other is to dispose of them quietly and without sorrow. Adders are safe bedmates compared to people on the lower bands of the tone scale. Not all the beauty nor the handsomeness nor artificial social value nor property can atone for the vicious damage such people do to sane men and women. The sudden and abrupt deletion of all individuals occupying the lower bands of the tone scale from the social order would result in an almost instant rise in the cultural tone and would interrupt the dwindling spiral into which any society may have entered. It is not necessary to produce a world of clears in order to have a reasonable and worthwhile social order; it is only necessary to delete those individuals who range from 2.0 down, either by processing them enough to get their tone level above the 2.0 line — a task which, indeed, is not very great, since the amount of processing in many cases might be under fifty hours, although it might also in others be in excess of two hundred — or simply quarantining them from the society. A Venezuelan dictator once decided to stop leprosy. He saw that most lepers in his country were also beggars. By the simple expedient of collecting and destroying all the beggars in Venezuela an end was put to leprosy in that country.

— Science of Survival: Prediction of Human Behavior by L. Ron Hubbard

Dude was a damn NUTCASE.

***

Paul Ramsey has a very important history lesson to teach us about how (((the special people))) created their homeland:

I’ve been to Israel. I loved it there. I truly believe that Israel is a God-blessed country inhabited by a tough, resilient, remarkable people. It is the Jewish homeland and the Jews have an absolute right to defend it and keep it Jewish.

Which is why any Jew who agitates for open borders and Left-wing ideologies, needs to be sent straight back to Israel – either voluntarily or otherwise, immediately.

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If socialism is so brilliant… why is it that ALL of the boats are going from Cuba to Miami, and NONE of them are going the other way?

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#BasedTucker is based:

It is well past time to tell the Left in the USA and other Western countries to go their own way, and separate them out from the rest of us. Let them go, wall off their cities, cut off their food and water supplies, and let them create their socialist paradises as they please.

That is the only way to avoid bloodshed that will make WWII look like a fight at a children’s tea party.

Also from #BasedChadMan:

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Our friend 1st Sergeant Terrence Popp (US Army, Ret.) does a righteous job of smacking down a whole load of bullshit spewed forth by an utter slore:

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Your history lesson for the week is all about those lovely, neighbourly, charming Mongols – who showed how much they loved their neighbours by slaughtering the shit out of them and then making pyramids out of their skulls:

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Remember how Dances with Pocahontas and the Last of the Samurai in Ferngully – uh, I mean, AVATAR – drove home the message that GIANT BLUE ALIENS GOOD, HOOMINTS BAD!!! with all of the subtlety and finesse of a clown-car crash?

Turns out, we might have missed a trick:

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In case it hasn’t been made as clear as possible by now – the new STAR WARS films are merely really bad and stupid rip-offs of the originals:

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Oh, so getting woke is causing the STAR WARS franchise to go broke? YOU DON’T F***ING SAY?!?!?:

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Our buddy Razorfist explores the ways in which the Goolag memory-holes videos that are inconvenient for them:

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Your long-ass adolt edjoomacayshun video of the day is courtesy of a “scientific heretic” who goes by the name of Dr. David Berlinski, who has a lot of interesting and thoughtful things to say about the Theory of Evolution by Natural Selection:

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What do you suppose would happen if the dinosaurs decided to get all Bolshevik on the Flintstones?

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Jezza being… well, Jezza, really:

He’s right about the need for all of the hosts to be completely in tune with each other. The show that he cannot name – which he just so happened to host, back in the day, along with those other two wazzocks, Hammond and May – is failing precisely because the chemistry between the hosts is nothing like as good as it was between the old trio.

And here’s some more of the blokiest blokes ever to bloke across a TV screen:

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By the way – you know how Hamster referred to a Dutchman kicking a Spaniard in the heart in that third video in the section above?

That shit actually happened in the 2010 World Cup Final:

Speaking as a martial artist… his form needs some work, but as flying tae kwon do kicks go, I approve heartily.

Speaking as a sports fan… well, soccer isn’t a sport worth watching, so who cares?

And speaking as a fan of good music… there is a reason why the vuvuzela has never caught on outside of Africa. Just sayin’.

Slightly more seriously – yes, Nigel de Jong definitely deserved a red card for that.

***

More wazzockery from the days of THE GRAND TOUR:

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I’m sure I’ve included this one before in one of my linkage posts, but this video is a true classic which makes me collapse into uncontrollable laughter every time I see it.

It is, of course, the Classic Hot-Crazy Matrix:

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Pics, girls, guns:

Brace yourselves, boys, Floriduh Man approacheth!!!

Your “NO SHIT SHERLOCK!!!” moments of the week:

Your Dreadful Tragedy of the week:

This next headline is a head-scratcher until you do a little research:

To be clear – the woman in question was smuggling methamphetamines in her vagina.

This is what she looks like:

Ashley Rolland

She’s definitely in the danger zone on the classic Hot-Crazy Scale.

Your “OH SHIT!!!” moment of the week:

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Your dog of the week is the Russian Spaniel:

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For this week’s gym idiots section, we’re going to do something a bit different – and have an actual serious lifter talk about the Scientology of Fitness:

This guy’s channel is pretty good, actually – check out the way that he tackles the “body positivity” bullshit that is so common these days:

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And now for the gym BEASTS segment, where we continue with the four monsters from last week as they attempt to perform feats of strength similar to those of strongmen from days past:

Here’s another one from the same series, and I have to say, as someone who does heavy squats and deadlifts, and has suffered repeated back injuries, this is genuinely terrifying to watch:

You have to watch the full videos to get some idea of just how insane strongmen really are.

Only true iron addicts understand the mentality of a powerlifter or strongman. We are not healthy people and we do not pretend to be. As I’ve been saying for years, there is something fundamentally broken within those of us who try to lift as much weight as we possibly can, something that will not let us accept defeat, something that will not be satisfied with anything less than a competitive best.

We destroy our bodies in the gym and in competitions to be as good as we can be. We kill ourselves in order to get that little bit extra on a squat, a deadlift, or a bench press – or in any strongman event.

And we wouldn’t have it any other way.

***

I have to admit, this is kind of my idea of a dream gym too:

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Just as long as the chicks aren’t clogging up the squat rack, you understand.

***

The usual martial arts monster is coming up, of course, but first let’s take a look at one of the best, if not the best, muay thai fighters of all time – a legend by the name of Samart Payakaroon who was and remains one of the most elusive, technical, and skilled fighters ever to enter a ring. He had moves that make Saenchai look slow and clumsy by comparison. I’m not even sure what stance he used most of the time – he seemed to be comfortable with both orthodox and southpaw and could destroy an opponent from either side with ease.

Buakaw Banchamek himself has stated on the record that he believes that Samart Payakaroon is the greatest nak muay of all time. Given Buakaw’s incredible record and brutal fighting style, that alone should tell you all you need to know about how good this guy was:

That teep of his is something to behold. It’s not really a straight front kick, the way that most nak muay do it. Rather, it is a combination of a front and side kick which generates a lot of distance while giving Samart the flexibility to jab, hook, or fade right out again – and it lands high, much higher than a typical teep. You catch one of those in the collarbone or the throat, and you’re not going to be coming forward in a very big hurry.

I’ve seen Buakaw throw nastier teeps in that classic first fight against Masato – where he basically opened up a muay thai school on the Japanese guy and left his footprints all over Masato’s face. But it’s very hard to do this accurately and with good timing.

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Speaking of Buakaw – here’s your Buakaw Beatdown of the Week, and this one features a rare and controversial defeat for the Human Terminator by a Russian named Khayal Dzhaniev. Buakaw showed incredible heart during this fight and simply refused to give up even after his opponent’s elbows resulted in a sheet of blood across his face. Buakaw battered the Russian’s ribs into broken pieces using his legs, but he still lost a controversial decision that a LOT of spectators thought that he should have won.

It’s not all bad news, though – Buakaw’s protege, Superbon Banchamek, later knocked out the same guy, avenging his mentor’s loss.

Also – if you’ve never read or seen an interview with Buakaw, it’s worth checking out this one. The dude is a terrifying badass in the ring when he is stalking his opponents with dreadful intent to cause grievous bodily harm – but outside of the ring, he’s actually a really decent guy.

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#HellbentForMetal

CIVIL WAR was formed out of the part of SABATON that didn’t want to go on such a punishing touring schedule, back before Carolus Rex was released. I never really thought much of them, since I thought that SABATON were the shit when it came to war metal, but I have to admit… they kick ass.

And now let’s go straight into batshit insane territory:

I just… I can’t… what the HELL?!?!?

Actually, while we’re on the subject of highly offbeat musical selections – check out METSATOLL:

I’ve seen these guys play live. They are really good. They are a four-piece band with one really tall dude with an extremely deep voice who plays all of the traditional instruments. And their music is this really weird blend of Estonian folk songs and heavy metal. It’s impossible to understand but a LOT of fun to listen to when you’re, oh I dunno, drunker than a skunk. (Not that I would know anything about that, of course.)

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Instathot time, and once more we feature a thot from the realitard TV show that seems to generate more thots than any other, ITV’s Love Island. This girl’s name is India Reynolds, and of course they don’t come too much thottier than her.

That’s a wrap for this Monday, gents. Get out there, crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentations of their women.

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1 Comment

  1. Anonymous

    That Terrence Popp video was right on target. She is the textbook definition of a slut. Her lack of self awareness is stunning. Do these people not read other's work? ~10 dudes a year/10 years, cats, student debt, crummy car? Proud of it and wonders why guys back off?

    She will, of course, as the good Sgt said, be writing "where are all the good guys"pieces.

    I'm sure I'm not giving away the store here, but it's little secret that guys partition their sex lives. They'll happily bang a slut if there's nothing better at the time. But they don't generally bring them home to mama or introduce her to their friends. I've known guys that would stoop real low when they were thirsty – so bad they'd tell the chick not to tell anyone they did that. To have guys take a pass, especially if you aren't older and are fit (more or less) that's bad.

    Back in the day, her mom would have counseled her to get married while she still could. All my son's and daughter's friends are at that age (~25) and are wifing up. Good guys that predisposed to be good husbands and fathers start marrying up around that age, if they can.

    Don't think it matters in her case, she's pretty spent. Can't spend a decade or so treating your body like an amusement park and expect others will always want to ride. Liek he said – Teens, just like with an old car – to get practice.

    Reply

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