Monday. Jeebus. Why can’t this day come included with an SJW to flay and whose skull we can chase with silver and use to drink their blood red wine?

Well, let’s get on with it – and hopefully cause a few SJWs to lose their lunches, and eventually their jobs, in the process.

The final full trailer for Devil Mouse Wars IX is out, and… well, see for yourselves:

The Drinker has a go at analysing it, and makes it clear that he is, if anything, even less impressed than I am:

This new film is going to SUCK. The hard reality is that J. J. Abrams is not an especially original or visionary director, even though he is routinely given both appellations by a fawning (((media))). Yeah, he did some cool stuff with Alias, Lost, and Cloverfield, but beyond that… not a whole lot.

And when he was given the directorial reins for Star Trek and now STAR WARS, he has proven to be little more than a hack who rips off the best bits of previous installments in the sagas and doesn’t give a damn about canonicity, plot, character development, or anything resembling a compelling series of story arcs.

As Bill Whittle and the Right Angle crew point out, STAR WARS is failing, utterly and completely, because J. J. Abrams never misses an opportunity to miss an opportunity:

What the three of them miss, by a mile, is the fact that the Devil Mouse no longer cares about what is good, beautiful, and true – which is to say, logos.

The original trilogy used time-tested archetypes, stories, and cultural touchstones to create compelling, flawed characters, fascinating plotlines, and a huge fictional universe in which to play around with crazy cool ideas.

Luke Skywalker, Han Solo, Princess Leia, Obi-Wan Kenobi, and Darth Vader were all based on ideas and stories that go right the way back through Mankind’s history. The film itself was heavily influenced by an old Akira Kurosawa film called The Hidden Fortress, which in turn drew inspiration from old Japanese stories and fables. The space battles were inspired by actual WWII aerial combat. The character of Darth Vader was deliberately designed to be utterly terrifying because it played on our deepest and darkest fears.

The Devil Mouse understands none of these things, because they don’t actually want to create a good story. They just want money – and they don’t give the minutest quantity of a damn about what they destroy in the process. Of course, what they don’t realise is that by chasing the shekels, they are guaranteeing their own destruction.

STAR WARS is dead now, and I for one am absolutely delighted about that fact.

***

The Russians make some rather good points about the opioid addiction crisis in America and the role that Big Pharma has played in creating it:

US drug distributors AmerisourceBergen Corp., Cardinal Health Inc., and McKesson Corp. – as well as Israel-based drug manufacturer Teva Pharmaceuticals – have tentatively settled suits with two Ohio counties for $260 million, over charges they misled the public about the addictive potential of their drugs. The deal narrowly avoids a federal trial that was set to start on Monday, but does not address some 2,600 other suits nationwide against those companies and others – including Purdue Pharma, the company that kicked off the epidemic with its blockbuster opioid OxyContin.

More than 20 years and 400,000 deaths after the debut of the devastatingly popular drug, it’s a relief that authorities are finally getting around to holding some of the perpetrators responsible. Opioids kill more Americans every year than car crashes, and have singlehandedly decreased the average US lifespan. However, the crisis is less due to especially evil schemes by those particular companies, and more of the inevitable outcome of a healthcare system where curing the patient pays less than keeping them coming back, again and again.

Opioid manufacturers and distributers merely took advantage of a corrupt and broken business model, where pharmaceutical companies were able to collude with medical authorities to elevate “pain” to the level of a vital sign alongside blood pressure, temperature, respiratory rate and pulse, presenting their product as the only truly effective solution to the problem. When Purdue unleashed OxyContin on the market in 1996, they simply lied and claimed their product had an addiction rate in the single digits. The other companies followed their lead: by the time OxyContin was reformulated to make it less appealing to addicts, there were Vicodin, Lortab, and fentanyl, waiting in the wings.

Hand in hand with the American Academy of Pain Medicine, the American Pain Society, and other authoritative-sounding groups, Purdue seduced doctors with an irresistible one-two punch. First they were told they were remiss in not checking all their patients for pain, the fifth vital sign. Then they were told that OxyContin is the only opioid painkiller that has managed to overcome the addictive factor, so they should overcome “opiophobia” and start writing prescriptions.

One thing that is becoming clear is that there is no magic solution to America’s opioid crisis. It is not a problem that permits easy categorisation or trite, simplified analysis. It is a deep-rooted moral and spiritual rot within America that is causing truly terrible problems across huge swathes of the nation.

***

At the rate that Western civilisation is flushing itself straight down the shitter, we’re going to have Ivy League universities offering BAs in Porn Studies soon:

Starting in 2020, students of Art History and Visual Culture at the University of Exeter will be able to take a module entitled ‘Pornography: Bodies, Sex and representation’, where they will learn all about the main theories and debates surrounding the making, spreading and consumption of – porn.

The module will delve into a range of erotic material, including historically-censored films, gay and feminist porn, and amateur pornography.

Though a university module, students won’t be analyzing the fluid dynamics of a perfect ‘money shot,’ or crunching the numbers to find out the business secrets of the most successful smut vendors. Instead, they’ll be examining the subject through the lens of the social sciences.

I’d love to see what kind of a job someone with a “BA in Pornography” would be able to get…

***

We’ve got a bunch of good stuff from our friend The Male Brain this week.

First up, here’s an article from Commentary magazine about how Bernie “Medicare for A-AAAARGH!!! (clutches chest)” Sanders is too liberal even for the Scandicucks:

The irony is that while American socialists want to become like Scandinavian socialists, Scandinavian socialists want to become more like American capitalists. I remember hearing a fellow senator put it this way: “The American Left wants to become Western Europe. Western Europe wants to become Eastern Europe. Eastern Europe, sick of socialism and Communism, wants to become American capitalists!” Indeed, the Danes seem a bit squeamish about all the attention from Bernie and want to make sure that the rest of the world knows they are not, in fact, socialist and are open for business.

It’s not just the “socialist” label that might concern the Danes. Denmark’s economic success is inseparable from free trade and low corporate-income taxes. Bernie’s policy decisions are the opposite of policies the Danes believe foster their success.

The idea that the Scandinavian nations are all socialist is a huge misconception. Yes, they have very high taxes and large-scale welfare states – but they fund those socialist hallmarks with very open, low-regulation, low-tax business environments. And yes, they’re completely cucked out, and will be for the near future, but when it comes to taxes and regulation and trade, at least, they have their heads screwed on straight.

Now let’s see whether they can do anything about getting all Vikinged up and treating their vast populations of foreign invaders to a bit of old-school Varangian burning and pillaging.

***

As The Male Brain points out, The Big Bang Theory was a vastly overrated show with a lot of problems, and if you take a few minutes to examine it properly, you will quickly realise why.

The writing was sloppy:

The jokes were painfully unfunny once you turn off the laugh track:

And, of course, it is important to remember that the show was about mocking nerd culture, not accepting it:

***

Here’s a link shared by TMB from our friend Aaron Clarey about how Leftists and radical Islamist nutbags are basically indistinguishable:

Note the many similarities between the spoiled brat-come-professional protestor and Islamic terrorists. The majority of these professional activists and protestors do not come from the slums of Cabrini Green in Chicago or the pits of Washington D.C. but from affluent suburbia with all their basic life necessities taken care of by daddy, allowing them the luxury of pursuing intellectual pursuits. The same can be said of Bin Laden and many of the terrorists. For they do not hail from poor, impoverished families in a podunk Pakistani village, but rather are the sons of billionaires, doctors or most recently spoiled kids enjoying the high standards of living in the United Kingdom. Also much like their leftist American counterparts they are all relatively young or were young when they converted to their cause. Most protestors (bar the burnt out loser hippie professor from the 60’s) are under the age of 35 as are most of the terrorists, an age at which they are susceptible to indoctrination. The only difference is the tool used for indoctrination. For the American college student it is the seemingly “something for nothing” attraction of socialism. For the young, affluent muslim, it is radical Islam.

This is absolutely true if you spend just a few minutes thinking about it. Leftists and Islamists both live in fantasy worlds and see themselves as superheroes for using violence and anarchy to achieve their vision of Utopia.

What they fail to understand, of course, is that their approach is doomed to fail, because it is not rooted in logic, therefore not rooted in truth.

***

Dave from Blue Collar Logic explains, with commendable honesty and openness, why he lives in an RV:

I admire the guy for having the guts and the frugality to downsize his living situation to the point where NOBODY owns him and no one can tell him what to do. That really is impressive and I respect a guy like that.

***

Related – the same bunch of sensible blue-collar types explain why the Daemoncrats truly are the party of America Last:

***

Question: How much cocaine have the Daemoncrats snorted in order to get to where they are now?

Answer: As Mark Dice points out here, ALL OF IT.

***

Paul Ramsey points out that the Hilldebeast is clearly losing her damn mind:

Look at the evidence.

The Bitch thinks that she could beat Donald Trump “again” – but she lost to His Most Benevolent and Legendary Celestial Majesty, the God-Emperor of Mankind, Donaldus Triumphus Magnus, the First of His Name.

She thinks that Tulsi Gabbard is a Russian spoiler agent – but she is the one with the dirtiest links to the Russian government, and who has done the most to damage the DNC through her refusal to use secure email systems.

And now she wants us to believe that she really wanted to be an astronaut when she was a little girl, as far back as 1960, maybe earlier – when she was roughly 14 years old. So, a) she wasn’t a little girl; b) being an astronaut wasn’t something that little girls at that time aspired to be; and c) she was raised originally in a conservative home and, in fact, used to be a Goldwater Girl in 1968.

The Hilldebeast had everything necessary to turn into a sensible conservative wife and mother. Instead she turned into a power-crazed warmonger, a destroyer of nations, a destabiliser of governments and societies, a willing participant in the rapes and sexual abuses of her husband, and a (possible) lesbian. (I’m saying “possible” only because I don’t want to get sued.)

The only parallel that I can think of that might drive the point home is that Satan used to work for God.

***

Related – Greg Gutfeld is in rare form with this one:

“The Queen of Warmongers” as a lost IRON MAIDEN record – that was a great joke.

***

#BasedTucker is based:

***

Some powerful and compelling common sense from, of all places, Australia:

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See, THIS is how you deal with pagan infiltration of the Church!

Several devout Catholics read this blog. While I am not a rosary-rattler myself, I do have a great deal of respect for the Holy Mother Church and what it stands for – or at least, what it used to stand for. I don’t quite “grok” the whole veneration of the Virgin Mary and all, and some of the Catholic doctrines concerning her strike me as a bit odd, but I absolutely support the great good that the Church has done throughout history.

But, as we know, the Church is under vicious attack from both without and within – and the forces of Satanic evil have infested the Church quite thoroughly at this point. A new Inquisition is needed to purge the unclean and burn the heretic.

And it looks like we might just be getting one, in our own lifetimes.

DEUS VULT!!!

***

Will Witt offends the shit out of a bunch of idiot university students by dressing like a Chinaman – but amusingly enough the Chinese people themselves couldn’t care less:

***

Once more with your history lessons of the week:

***

Mat Best and his buddies show us once again why it is a very, very bad idea to dick with veterans on Halloween:

Normally I would say that there is simply no such thing as “TOO MUCH” guns and ammo – the very idea is ridiculous, right?

Well… Mat and his buddies do test that theory right up to the breaking point…

***

Our friend the Gentleman Adventurer points out what those of us who have even the foggiest understanding of what Australia is, already know – that EVERYTHING THERE WANTS TO KILL YOU AND EAT YOUR EYEBALLS FOR SNACKS!!!:

Well, I grew up in Western Australia. It is my home state and I have worked and traveled in many parts of it. Here is what I see when I look at this photo:

I see death. That area is infested with death adders and brown snakes. The coral is teeming with blue ringed octopus not to mention the sharks. There is not an inch of shade visible. They better have some water with them. What do they do if they walk back to their vehicle and it doesn’t start? No cell coverage out there. Do you walk or do you stay? No passing vehicles, it’s probably miles back to the main road. If it’s over 20 km then you will die walking before you get there. Minimum of two vehicles needed to go to these sorts of locations.

And I haven’t even begun to mention the flies.

And, yes, granted, that’s from Western Australia. I lived in New South Wales for a few years, and I can tell you personally, from having seen a gigantiferous spider that made its home in the back wall of our garage in the house in Sydney, that things DO NOT get better as you travel east.

The whole damn country is just one giant death-trap. It’s not in the least bit surprising that the Pommie Bastards sent their convicts over there to die.

The worst thing about Australia, though, is their tourists. If you have never met Australian backpackers on holiday in places like Bali and Thailand, consider yourself lucky. My Lord, but they are annoying.

***

Time for some classic comedy from PommieBastardLand, and we start with Rowan Atkinson doing a really quite hilarious imitation of an Indian doctor:

Also, Pixie Lott is damn hot.

By the way, Rowan Atkinson may well be the smartest comedian alive – in fact, he is almost certainly one of the smartest people alive, anywhere in the world.

He has a BSc in Electrical Engineering from Newcastle University and an MSc in Electrical Engineering from The Queen’s College, Oxford. Anyone who knows anything about engineering knows that the three hardest engineering disciplines are nuclear, electrical, and aerospace. The dude really is amazingly smart.

His IQ is rumoured to be 178, which makes him smarter than just about everyone else on the planet – if that is true, then he’s quite likely smart enough to figure out string theory all on his lonesome. If his IQ is, in fact, that high, then it is likely very difficult to measure accurately, as standard IQ tests break down once you get past about 170 or so.

It’s hard to distinguish between someone with a 178 and a 200 IQ, because you are literally at the most extreme end of the bell curve – there are only about 700 or so people in the ENTIRE WORLD smarter than someone with a 178 IQ, in theory, but in practice the number is almost certainly smaller than that.

However, I rather doubt that he is truly that intelligent, because then he would have enormous difficulty communicating with ordinary people and would likely be very bad at actual comedy. But there is no question that he is extremely intelligent.

***

Wazzocks gonna wazzock:

***

Pics, girls, guns:

If you’ve never watched a Jeff Dunham special – totally worth it. He’s brilliant.

Time for some headlines with Floriduh Man leading the way:

Floriduh Woman is obviously taking notice:

Now this is a Devil Mouse affiliate product that I might actually consider buying:

Look carefully at that one…

That must have come from California.

Computer programmers are going to die laughing from that one.

MAKE IT SO!!!

***

Your dog of the week is the perpetually floppy, sad-eyed, and lovable basset hound:

***

Your gym idiots of the week come via the Trap Lord, of course, and concern the clowns of CrossFit:

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TRT Belfort was genuinely, truly, utterly terrifying:

***

While we’re on the subject of beefed-up jacked dudes beating the shit out of each other with their fists:

Evander Holyfield is something of a cautionary tale. He hung on way too long in his career, and it’s likely that this is not just because he loved his sport:

Evander Holyfield continued to box well into his late 40s, and it is more than likely that this was not because he loved getting into the ring. Instead, it is much more likely that it has something to do with his record outside of the ring. Holyfield has 11 children with six different women, including two children out of wedlock. In 2013, Holyfield was found to have failed to pay over $500,000 in back child support. Despite amassing a staggering fortune of $230 million in the ring, the majority of this is now gone due to gambling, three messy divorces and payments for his collection of offspring.

He also made a number of staggeringly stupid financial decisions with respect to his huge 5,000 sq. m. property.

Moral of the story: don’t be like Evander Holyfield, or most heavyweight boxers, for that matter. Learn from their legendary boxing skills, for sure, but don’t emulate their lifestyles.

***

Just before we get to the nightmare in human form that is Buakaw – at least, when he’s in the ring – let’s take a look at some truly insane acts of kickboxing violence in the world of muay thai:

One of the key lessons of fighting to draw from that clip is something that my Grandmaster told me, and other students, over and over again in sparring classes:

“The moment you cover up, you become a heavy bag.”

And that is absolutely true. The moment you close off your face and head from punishment by covering up with gloves, you lose sight of your opponent and as such you obstruct your ability to see, and therefore to react, to what he’s doing. This means that he can just UNLOAD on you and beat the shit out of you with every weapon at his disposal.

It is possible to wear an opponent out – by taking enormous amounts of punishment yourself, then waiting for him to drop his guard and smashing him. This is a high-risk, low-reward strategy that usually ends very, very badly for the idiot who tries it.

***

Your Buakaw Beatdown of the Week is very special this time, because it involves Lawrence Kenshin explaining how the Buakawminator came to be:

Buakaw is obviously well past his true prime by now – he’s 35 or thereabouts, ancient by the standards of most nak muay. But he is still a true force of nature, a nearly indestructible beast in the ring who fights with blinding speed, explosive power, and incredible intelligence.

He’s also absolutely terrifying to behold as he simply marches down his opponents, ruthlessly, relentlessly, and with absolute and unstoppable brutality.

His 2004 victory against Masato in that classic K-1 final was, and is, a legendary fight. Masato had literally no idea what the hell happened to him. Buakaw utterly dominated that fight from start to finish. He left his footprints all over Masato’s face, which is definitely not supposed to happen if you are one of the best kickboxers in the world. He beat Masato with his hands, knees, and shins as though the Japanese guy was a pinata for three brutal rounds – but because Masato is Japanese, the Japanese refs called it a “draw” and sent it into a fourth deciding round.

That went about how you might expect, really, because the Japanese refs forgot Rule #1 of Dealing with Buakaw:

DO. NOT. F***. WITH. BUAKAW. BANCHAMEK.

And yes, Buakaw lost the rematch with Masato in 2007. This is because of a combination of rule changes in the K-1 organisation – they changed the rules about clinching specifically because Buakaw was so devastating at close range with knees – and because of that, Masato had the ability to disengage more easily from the clinch, find his range with his boxing, and deal with Buakaw’s slightly inferior (at the time) boxing skills.

This goes to show one basic reality of combat sports: the rule sets matter. If you are a kickboxer fighting under muay thai rules, and you don’t train in clinching and elbow strikes, you’re dead. And if you’re a nak muay and you enter a grappling tournament, well, you might as well get fitted for your casket right there.

What separates good fighters from truly great and legendary ones – like Buakaw Banchamek – is in their ability to adapt to rule sets over time that change their fighting styles and force them to modify their movements and striking patterns.

***

#HeavyMetalMania

That version is actually better than the original single that SOILWORK released back in the day. On this version, which I think is the one you get on the album, you get a really good female vocal performance from Alyssa White-Gluz that complements the robotic, driving, pounding nature of the track quite well.

***

And here’s your Instathot to start the week. Now, this week I had a bit of a problem. You see, I prepare these Monday compilations days in advance, but sometimes the Instathot that I choose decides to be a total buzzkill and take her account private, because THOT, and thots don’t like being called out for their thottery.

This always and inevitably ruins all of my carefully designed plans. Such was the case this week, because the thot in question, Ava Karabatic, was very similar to last week’s model, in that she used to be a Playboy model and is now a politician running for office in Croatia.

But a replacement had to be found. So here I am forced to resort to a realitard thot from PommieBastardLand name Kendall Rae Knight, who appeared on everybody’s favourite trashy reality TV show, Love Island.

Talk about your last-minute replacement who isn’t up to snuff…

Anyway, that’s it for this Monday, boys. Now get out there and start with the crushing already.

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