Hell’s Bells, it’s Monday again. And, unfortunately, if you thought that last week was bad, this week looks like it’s going to be even worse.
And we all know why that is.
It is because the Chinese gave the ENTIRE FREAKIN’ WORLD a severe case of sniffles, caused, rather than cured, by bat soup.
Yes, that is both inaccurate and racist. And I don’t really give a shit at this point. With over 300,000 people infected globally, over 13,000 deaths, and EVERY GYM THAT I CAN USE closed for the foreseeable future, my ability to give a crap about political correctness has gone where the dead bats go after they get digested.
So, let’s get started with the Great Monday Browser Destroyer with the dankest of dank memes about the Wu Flu, starting with a song about it:
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His Most Illustrious, Noble, August, Benevolent, and Legendary Celestial Majesty, the God-Emperor of Mankind, Donaldus Triumphus Magnus Astra, the First of His Name, has been getting shellacked by the lying whorenalists of the mainstream (((media))) for his supposed “boosterism” with respect to the well-known anti-malarial drug chloroquine, and for his use of his very large bully pulpit to tout the “excellent job” that his Administration is doing in the current crisis.
The problem is that the (((media))) still doesn’t get it: we can see straight through their lies.
In the first place, the God-Emperor’s response HAS been excellent. That is a fact. As of right this moment, the outbreak in the USA is confined mostly to four states – New York, New Jersey, California, and Illinois – which account for more than half of the entire set of confirmed cases. The other 14,000 or so cases are distributed among the remaining 47 states, and that means an average of about 306 confirmed cases per state.
Those numbers ARE going to increase, and fast. Of this, there can be no doubt. But there can also be no doubt or question that the God-Emperor’s insistence on slamming the borders shut has spared America from a far worse plague. The three states that are most heavily exposed to COVID-19 are also, not at all coincidentally, the three with large populations of Chinese people, large immigrant populations, and a high degree of air traffic connectivity with both Europe and Asia.
And in the second place, President Trump did not exaggerate the effects of chloroquine, at all. He did not lie about them. He did not claim credit for them. He did not deviate from the opinions of medical experts about the ways in which the drug could be used.
All he did was sound optimistic that chloroquine could be used to ease the effects of the plague:
The reaction from the press corps was nothing short of disgusting. These people aren’t journalists – they’re traitors. And they deserve to be treated like traitors.
There was a time when legitimate journalists understood that they had a duty to their own people as well as to reporting the truth. Sometimes, in times of panic and crisis, it is necessary to tell it like it is – and sometimes it is necessary to put an optimistic spin on things. That is the nature of leadership in a time of testing.
Journalists no longer understand this. They only understand that they cannot criticise China, even though China is the precise cause of this present crisis, because otherwise they won’t get paid. Which, once you cut through all the baloney and horseshit, simply means that they are enemy agents now, working for a foreign power.
That does not mean that press criticism of the President is unwarranted. The God-Emperor absolutely must be held accountable for his decisions and actions.
But this current generation of whorenalists are not the people to do it.
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#BasedTucker is based – and he’s been on an absolute tear over the past week:
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Laura Ingraham has more common sense to add to the conversation:
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Mark Dice is doing his part to keep your spirits up during this time of madness:
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Bill Whittle and the crew discuss how the COVID-19 crisis will affect the upcoming Presidential election:
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Dave from Blue Collar Logic takes on the wave of fear porn inundating the world right now:
And here he is addressing the very topic of this Great Mondaydact Browser Crash:
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The Male Brain is spending his time in semi-lockdown over in southern Israel very well indeed, because he has sent over plenty of good stuff for this week.
We start with the way that STAR WARS: The Fall of Skywalker was pitched, which would explain A LOT about how awful that movie was:
Turning to the dating market, it turns out that being an advocate for women’s rights doesn’t actually get a girl dates – at least, not as much as she would like:
That being said, as Dawn Pine himself put it, the woman has a 60% return rate and a 9% conversion rate – which are statistics that most sex-starved men of our day and age would absolutely KILL for.
And here’s something else that women do which men hate:
That isn’t merely good advice for women. It’s also good advice for men. Leave your personal baggage out of any advertising that you do when getting dates. Keep it simple and light.
And, if you are a Christian – STAY AWAY FROM ONLINE DATING!!!
Also – IMPACTFUL IS NOT A WORD, DAMMIT!!!
Sorry, but my inner Grammar Nazi always gets annoyed with that one.
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Just as you can’t stump the Trump, you absolutely can’t flog the Mogg:
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The good folks from China Uncensored explain how the Chinese government is spinning the COVID-19 disaster in their favour:
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Jared Taylor from American Renaissance looks at the latest affirmative action brainwave from the Daemoncrats, and is deeply unimpressed:
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PJW has some harsh words for the people overreacting to Corona-chan’s pestilential presence:
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Paul Ramsey points out that Corona-chan is the plague that we deserve right now:
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Terrence Popp takes on the Kung Flu:
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Lord Razorfist bids the unreconstructed Commie Jew a not-at-all-fond farewell, and looks at the distinct possibility that the Daemoncrats are going to face a contested convention – the one thing that makes them wet their short trousers:
He also takes some time to look at some of the absolute WORST games of the past decade:
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Midnight’s Edge takes some time during the quarantine to break down and dispose of one of the crazier rumours out there:
And now that the SJW idiots at YouTube have finally given up trying to censor and thought-police people for telling it like it is – that COVID-19 originated in China and that the never-to-be-sufficiently-damned Chinese government initially tried to cover up a very serious outbreak – the same guys at ME can explain how Corona-chan will affect Hollyweird:
It’s a very good thing that Hollyweird’s degeneracy has been totally shut down by the virus. I feel really bad for the innocents who depend on the movie industry for their daily bread, but I don’t feel sorry AT ALL for the actors and (((studio bosses))) who have done so much to damage to the West’s culture.
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Gary from Nerdrotic simply dissolves into gales of laughter at the latest news about a new Star Trek: Discovery movie in the works – because the CBS TV series worked out so splendidly for all concerned that we TOTES need a new film from the same idiots:
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Overlord Dicktor Von Doomcock is EXTREMELY unimpressed by the new SJWarriors from Marvel Comics:
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Dave Cullen thought the SJWarriors from Marvel was an absolute joke, but is absolutely appalled to learn that it is not:
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The Drinker stopped writing and drinking himself into oblivion long enough to watch the new Wonder WAMMENZ 1984 trailer, and was thoroughly underwhelmed:
That brings to mind a good line from the beginning of the classic early Millennial film, 10 Things I Hate About You:
“I know you can be overwhelmed, and I know you can be underwhelmed, but can you ever just be whelmed?”
“Uh… I think you can in Europe!”
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I bag on the Satanic garbage spewed forth by Hollyweird every single week, because I hate it. But there was a time when the industry produced truly great films with truly spellbinding moments – like pretty much anything involving Al Pacino, back when he was at the peak of his powers:
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Here’s your “Science is F***ING WEIRD” moment of the week – apparently there actually was something like a “turducken bird” that walked with the dinosaurs, way back in the day:
The fossil of the Wonderchicken — named in part because it looks like a mash-up of a duck and a chicken — was found in the Romontbos Quarry near fort Eben-Emael in Liège, on the Belgium-Netherlands border.
The ancient remains include a complete skull as well as leg fragments — with the bird displaying many common features with the fowl you might see in farmyards in the present day.
It is the oldest example ever found of a common ancestor to the family of birds called ‘galloanserae’ — which also includes quails.
Here’s what the thing probably looked like:
Might taste good stuffed with gravy, actually.
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Your long read of the week looks at the hard and sober evidence of the COVID-19 outbreak and tries to give us “just the facts” about the disease – and those facts confirm that the current lockdowns and quarantines are a huge overreaction:
As the US continues to expand testing, the case fatality rate will decline over the next few weeks. There is little doubt that serious and fatal cases of COVID-19 are being properly recorded. What is unclear is the total size of mild cases. WHO originally estimated a case fatality rate of 4% at the beginning of the outbreak but revised estimates downward 2.3% — 3% for all age groups. CDC estimates 0.5% — 3%, however stresses that closer to 1% is more probable. Dr. Paul Auwaerter estimated 0.5% — 2%, leaning towards the lower end. A paper released on March 19th analyzed a wider data set from China and lowered the fatality rate to 1.4%. This won’t be clear for the US until we see the broader population that is positive but with mild cases. With little doubt, the fatality rate and severity rate will decline as more people are tested and more mild cases are counted.
Higher fatality rates in China, Iran, and Italy are more likely associated with a sudden shock to the healthcare system unable to address demands and doesn’t accurately reflect viral fatality rates. As COVID-19 spread throughout China, the fatality rate drastically fell outside of Hubei. This was attributed to the outbreak slowing spreading to several provinces with low infection rates.
That’s just a tiny snippet of all of the useful information in the article. It is well worth reading in full.
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Linkage is good for you:
- The French, of all people, are actually taking on Apple and telling them to sod off;
- You know shit’s gotten real when ISIS tells its supporters, who mostly suffer from severe cases of premature detonation, to avoid Europe because of Corona-chan;
- That thought is so hilarious that it deserves two links to properly mock the wussies of ISIS;
- The whorenalist classes are simply getting more shameless by the day as they lie about the God-Emperor’s handling of the COVID-19 outbreak and his requests to Big Tech to help;
- Red Chinese propaganda would have you believe that they defeated Corona-chan and saved the world;
- Given that the world economy is currently in free-fall because we keep listening to “expert” advice, maybe it’s worth not listening to them quite so much;
- Looking at the ways in which various countries have handled COVID-19 is instructive when formulating a national response – the USA is solidly in the middle of the pack right now;
- The real heroes right now are not the Hollyweird idiots singing along to John Lennon’s “Imagine”, they are the stockboys and truckers out there keeping people alive;
And some more stuff from The Male Brain:
- Corona-chan has forced Europe to confront the harsh reality that open borders kill people and nations;
- When that idiot mayor in Italy came up with the infamous “Hug a Chinese Person” campaign to combat LAYCISSM!!!, he probably didn’t expect it to bite him in the ass quite so fast;
- Turns out that the guy who saved countless millions of lives by teaching everyone how to wash his hands, had a pretty tragic life himself;
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The Neo-Tsar’s response to the spread of COVID-19 has so far been calm, careful, and backed by evidence – and the results show in the fact that Russia has one of the lowest infection rates anywhere in the world, despite doing a LOT of business with China:
There are also some good clips from his 20 Questions for 2020 series that he did with TASS that are well worth watching:
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Related – who do you suppose would win if the world’s second-largest military fought against probably the world’s second-best pound-for-pound military, in terms of technology, experience, and adaptability?
The Binkov’s Battlegrounds channel is not merely about crazy what-ifs – it also looks at modern weapon systems that pose a significant threat on the modern battlefield:
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History lessons of the week:
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Kitchen nightmares with everyone’s favourite angry Scot:
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Wazzocks gonna wazzock:
Oh, and the chief wazzock’s daughter just got engaged. Good for her – and for him.
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Comedy hour:
Jim Breuer’s impersonations are absolutely HYSTERICAL – especially those of Ozzy and James Hetfield. Here’s another one from him:
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Pics, guns, girls, and we start with a classic cartoon from the blessed era of St. Reagan Magnus of the Right, via Dawn Pine – and he got it via Aaron Clarey, and HE got it from teh innarwebz:
Here’s one from The Male Brain featuring a screenshot from Futurama that predicted what STAR WARS IX would be all about:
You know what?
That still would have been a better movie than The Fall of Skywalker.
In fact, a movie full of Yoda fart noises for 2 hours would have been a better movie than that.
And here are some more from Dawn Pine:
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| The caption there means: “Working from home” |
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| Caption means: “Activities with the kids” |
Now, since a lot of you are in lockdown right now with your wives and girlfriends, you are probably going a bit stir-crazy because you don’t have much to do. Fortunately, The Male Brain has a solution for you both to keep yourself busy, fit, and happy, while still maintaining some sort of safe social distance:
This next one is INCLEDIBREE LAYSIST:
You know times are getting bad when the hookers are offering literal layaway plans:
This week’s pictures segment is at least twice as long as usual, because the current quarantine situation has the guys over at Power Line working overtime to compile a list of dank memes:
At least one of my readers is practicing that advice right now – he’s in an extremely foul mood because of the way that people are overreacting to the Kung Flu, and he doesn’t much care who knows it.
It says something about me, and not necessarily anything good, that I actually like the sound of bagpipes.
Whoo boy, that was dark – but very funny.
I TOLD YOU SO!!!
Headlines of the week show that Corona-chan is even beginning to mess with Floriduh Man and Woman:
Your “Hooker Hygiene” moment of the week:
Your “The Internet is for Porn” moments – two of them – of the week:
Your “Inner City” moment of the week:
Your “GET TO THE CHOPPA!!!” moment of the week:
Your “High on Life” moment of the week:
Your “Early Day Motion” moment of the week:
Your “Balls Out” moment of the week:
Your “There’s Something About Miriam” moment of the week:
For those of you who didn’t get that last reference – look here…
Your “Yo Queiro Taco Bell” moment of the week:
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Your dog of the week is the Formosan Mountain Dog:
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In this terrible blighted age when gyms everywhere are shut, gym beasts need ways to work out too:
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Before we get to the Buakaw Beatdown, let’s bitchslap some bullshido:
That, right there, really is “Kung Phooey”.
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And as a cure for that particular strain of Kung Flu, here are some home training videos that the Grandmaster of my martial arts school in New York created with his top instructors, to help keep his students sane during the lockdowns:
I miss that school and those people more than words can possibly describe. Being away from them is like losing a member of your close family – but knowing that he or she is alive and well somewhere, simply unable to get back home no matter what you do to help.
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And now for your Buakaw Beatdown of the Week:
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#HeavyMetalFire
HALFORD’s Live Insurrection is an absolutely incredible live album – but as with almost every live album that Rob Halford has done, it is heavily overdubbed, due to the fact that Rob’s voice is highly inconsistent over the course of a performance and during a tour.
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And finally here’s your Instathot to start the week. Her name is Melania Puntas, age 27, from Cordoba in Spain. She is a “model” (*eyerolls*) based in Dubai (THOT-SIGHTING CONFIRMED). I have no idea what else to say about her, but she’s a cheery sight on a dreary day, that’s for sure.
All right, lads, that’s enough for this most epic of Great Mondaydact Browser Crashes. If you are stuck in isolation, whether self-imposed or otherwise, work out at home, read, start a business, or – yes, I’m totally going to go there – have LOTS of sex with your wife. It’s good for you and for her, and if it results in children, that’s a Very Good Thing.
And if you’re just procrastinating – get back to work, slacker. The CRUSHING!!! won’t happen by itself.
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