Of all the unexpected things to happen (thus far) in 2026 – and we are only a little over halfway through the year – the idea of the legendary William Shatner, aka Captain Kirk, fronting a heavy metal band, surely is right up near the top of the “too crazy to believe” list:

The announcement that Star Trek icon William Shatner would be playing at this year’s Riot Fest music festival threw fans for a loop.

The 95-year-old actor was revealed Thursday as a performer for the festival, as he will be fronting his band The *uckers during a show slated for September 20 at Douglass Park in Chicago.

The Montreal native was seen in a clip in which he confirmed his foray into the new musical venture in the Windy City.

‘Riot fest fans, Shatner here, I’ve been dinking around, found all those letters you sent me,’ Shatner said. ‘And I’ve decided, you’re such big fans of mine, that I’m gonna debut my heavy metal record at Riot Fest.

‘And I hope you’re there, and I hope I’m there. And I hope that you have my rider, and yes, don’t forget, my bowl of sauerkraut, if you please.’

First, we had Charlemetal:

Then, we had the Batmetal trilogy:

And now, we have Shatmetal – or maybe Kirkmetal is a better moniker:

There is, of course, precedent for great film stars and Ur-Alpha males who released heavy metal records of their own, or at least collaborated on them. Orson Welles supplied the epic voice for the MANOWAR track, “Defender” – and later, Brian Blessed did the same for the re-recorded one.

And then there is the aforementioned Count Christopher Dracula Dooku Summerisle Saruman Frankenstein de Richleau Catheter Charlemagne Lee, a man so awesome that the mourners almost certainly had to use heavy machinery to lift his coffin off the ground, due to the sheer weight of badassitude involved. He was quite literally a descendant of Karl Magnus, aka “Charlemagne”, the King of the Franks and, I think, the founder of what eventually became the Holy Roman Empire. (Which was a lot like Grape Nuts – just as the cereal is neither grape nor nuts, the HRE was neither Holy nor Roman.)

At the grand old age of 88 or so, he released an album that honoured his great ancestor – and then a sequel at the age of 91.

Kirkmetal has him beaten in the age department, at least; Bill Shatner is NINETY-FIVE YEARS OLD, and still going strong. Dude is an ALPHA among Alphas, for sure.

As for the music itself… well, who cares? It’s WILLIAM FREAKIN’ SHATNER, playing heavy metal.He could do what Udo Dirkschneider does and act like the world’s most awesome heavy metal grandpa, and that would be sufficient:

Hell, I’d watch Shatner doing that, just for shits and giggles. Good for him. It is really great to watch a living legend continuing to reinvent himself and have fun.