“We are Forerunners. Guardians of all that exists. The roots of the Galaxy have grown deep under our careful tending. Where there is life, the wisdom of our countless generations has saturated the soil. Our strength is a luminous sun, towards which all intelligence blossoms… And the impervious shelter, beneath which it has prospered.”

Your brain will implode

by | Jun 19, 2015 | Uncategorized | 0 comments

From the sheer epic awesomeness of seeing BAS RUTTEN and DOLPH LUNDGREN in the same video:

Say what you will about how cheesy and silly Dolph Lundgren’s movies are- the guy is a badass:

Mr. Lundgren was an almost-superstar back in the ’80s, having played comic hero The Punisher (1989 version) and even He-Man (1987). But, his greatest acting accomplishments is beating Apollo Creed into something resembling grape jelly and inspiring the greatest Rocky montage of all time. 

As it turns out, this towering blond monster who casually told Sylvester Stallone, “I will break you,” could have, in fact, probably calculated the amount of effort (in force pounds per square inch and Joules expenditure) needed to do just that in his head. 

The man reportedly has an IQ of 160. He graduated from the Royal Institute of Technology in Sweden, got his master’s in chemical engineering, then was awarded a Fulbright Scholarship to MIT. After just two weeks of that, his superhuman intellect allowed him to calculate that a life spent inventing life-saving chemicals would mathematically contain less awesome than one movie spent playing He-Man. 

Hey, did we mention that he speaks five languages (French, Swedish, German, English and Italian)? Or, that he’s a Pentathlon Team Leader and a former Ranger? And a third-degree black belt? 

So, really, to play a superhuman machine of destruction in Rocky IV, he still had to tone it down quite a bit. Hell, this man had to tone it down to play He-Man.

Dude might look like Lurch from the Addams Family- but he’s literally smart enough to understand rocket science. And he kicks and punches hard enough to send anything he wants into low-Earth orbit. 

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