“We are Forerunners. Guardians of all that exists. The roots of the Galaxy have grown deep under our careful tending. Where there is life, the wisdom of our countless generations has saturated the soil. Our strength is a luminous sun, towards which all intelligence blossoms… And the impervious shelter, beneath which it has prospered.”

Friday T&A: Winter Storm Edition

by | Jan 5, 2018 | fat girl jihad, Uncategorized

Well, the week that thou gavest us, Lord, hath ended, and the Sabbath cometh. Unfortunately, the Big Fella Upstairs doesn’t seem to be in a terribly good mood at the moment, which is why a massive “bomb cyclone” has basically shut down most of the...

Nissan versus woman

by | Jan 4, 2018 | fat girl jihad, Uncategorized

WHO YA GOT?!? Actually, it’s not just any woman, and it’s not just any old Datsun. The woman in question is Michelle Jenneke- an otherwise rather plain-looking lass from Kenthurst in Australia, who won a very large legion of male fans with her warm-up...

The party post

by | Dec 31, 2017 | fat girl jihad, Uncategorized

Shitlords and gun bunnies, it is time for the final countdown- no, not that one, though the music will follow shortly. In the meantime, let’s get this party STARTED!!! Bring on the GIRLS!!! A post shared by Elena (@elena_g_u_m_i) on Sep 20, 2017 at 12:26am PDT A...

Comedy gold

by | Dec 30, 2017 | fat girl jihad, Uncategorized

As if it were not obvious by now, we live in a very messed-up world. Sometimes it is worth reminding ourselves just how messed up it really is: Point and laugh, boys. There is so much to amuse oneself in there that it is difficult to know where to start. So...

Some advice never gets old

by | Dec 26, 2017 | fat girl jihad, Uncategorized

Seeing as it’s Boxing Day here- though it is still Christmas back in the good ol’ US of A- I figure that this might not be a bad time to dish out some old-fashioned dating advice to ladies of my age and younger who are stuck wondering where all the good...

What a woman

by | Dec 26, 2017 | fat girl jihad, Uncategorized

The wife of the God-Emperor certainly knows how to get into the festive spirit for Christmas: It was all about family this Christmas for the Trumps, who gathered at Mar-a-Lago in Palm Beach to celebrate the holiday. President Trump was spotted smiling while posing for...

I fail to see the problem

by | Dec 24, 2017 | fat girl jihad, Uncategorized

Christmas Eve is supposed to be about spending time with loved ones and preparing to celebrate the birth of the Saviour, and I am all in favour of that. Christmas itself is, after all, my single favourite day of the year. But, being a flawed and imperfect man as I am,...