“We are Forerunners. Guardians of all that exists. The roots of the Galaxy have grown deep under our careful tending. Where there is life, the wisdom of our countless generations has saturated the soil. Our strength is a luminous sun, towards which all intelligence blossoms… And the impervious shelter, beneath which it has prospered.”

The God-Emperor’s Monday media massacre

I had initially thought to leave this set of clips until the next Great Mondaydact Browser Buster, but then I saw what His Most Illustrious, Noble, August, Benevolent, and Legendary Celestial Majesty, the God-Emperor of Mankind, Donaldus Triumphus Magnus Astra, the...

Hope dies last

The Russians are a stout and stolid people – quite literally in many cases, given their heavily potato- and bread- and vodka-based diet – and they are not easily given to panic or hysteria. They have a rather grim sense of humour which you can see...

The God-Emperor and the Plague-Bearers

His Most Illustrious, Noble, August, Benevolent, and Legendary Celestial Majesty, the God-Emperor of Mankind, Donaldus Triumphus Magnus Astra, the First of His Name, announced yesterday that the USA would shut down all travel from Europe for a month and enact...

Winners aren’t losers

Back when he was a mere candidate for the highest office in the land, a certain real-estate billionaire developer appeared on a certain hack comedian’s certainly lousy late-night program, in which the hack comedian asked the billionaire to read out a...

Adolt Edumacation

I was reading through Power Line yesterday and came across this particularly hilarious indictment of the American education system: The money quote from Brian “I totally got shot down in a helicopter in Afghanistan” Williams had to be,...

Mini-Mikey and Mistress Elizabeth

I had planned to use this clip from #BasedTucker in the next Great Mondaydact Browser Crash, but it was simply too brilliant and too funny to keep waiting. This is Tucker Carlson in rare form: OK, first things first, to all of my red-blooded male audience: Can...

The rage of the storm

His Most Illustrious, Noble, August, Benevolent, and Legendary Celestial Majesty, the God-Emperor of Mankind, Donaldus Triumphus Magnus Astra, the First of His Name, simply keeps WINNING!!! at a truly breathtaking pace. And there is a very good reason for that:...

The WINNING will continue until their morale breaks

His Most Illustrious, Noble, August, Benevolent, and Legendary Celestial Majesty, the God-Emperor of Mankind, Donaldus Triumphus Magnus Astra, the First of His Name, has had a VERY good 48 hours. First came his State of the Union address, which was a true thing...

The face of the enemy

Jason from the Blue Collar boys is delighted to see the Clown News Network finally being honest about what a bunch of arrogant dipshits they are: In case you’re wondering about the NPR interview that Jason references at the beginning of the video, that...

The God-Emperor’s epic smackdown

No, I’m not referring to that meme that originated from HanAssholeSolo about Donald Trump beating up CNN – hysterical though it was. I’m talking about the severe dressing-down that His Most Illustrious, Noble, August, Benevolent, and Legendary...