There has been quite a lot of hoopla about Princess Catherine of Wales in PommieBastardLande, who has apparently gone missing and been replaced by a not-very-convincing series of body doubles. The whole fracas started when the future Queen went in for abdominal surgery in January, and then appeared in an evidently heavily Photoshopped picture with her three (quite adorable) sproglets for Mother’s Day in Limey Country:
The explanation that followed on Twitter was even more bizarre than the odd-looking photograph:
Things just got weirder, and much funnier, from there.
While I hate to inflict American whore-media upon my readers, in this case, Forbes actually has a decent timeline of the whole controversy up on their website – though I’m not saying this makes Forbes worth reading, mind you.
The photographic evidence has fuelled endless speculation on the subject of the Princess’s health – this photo, for instance, shows a woman who looks quite different from Kate Middleton:
A couple of days ago, TMZ released a video purporting to show the future King and Queen striding out of a grocery store with their shopping, and… well, you tell me what this looks like:
This has caught the attention of quite a few people, including the intrepid, and very married, Morrises – and their take on this whole situation had me busting a gut laughing:
Of course, the Brits want to pretend it’s all Русская Дезинформация, especially in the wake of unfounded rumours the British whore-media claim were spread by Russians about the premature death of the British King. That is itself a lie – the Russians merely spread around a rumour that originated with some other European media outlets.
Sadly, the British elites are ardently Russophobic, and took that as an opportunity to spread all sorts of very silly and highly scurrilous attacks on the Russians throughout their whore-media.
At this point, no doubt my American readers are sitting there asking, “WHO THE HELL CARES?!?!?! We rebelled to get AWAY from these taxpayer-funded elitists and rule ourselves!”
Which is, of course, an entirely fair sentiment – though we shall kindly overlook the fact that all y’all have the Kennedys, and that your little experiment in self-government has turned into a horrible nightmare that the rest of us are paying for, but hey, needs must.
This matters because, firstly, it is comedy gold, and secondly, because there is a video of Princess Kate looking QUITE uncomfortable a few years ago, back when she and her husband supported the not-vaxx rollout in the UK:
Look at her body language, with the sound off. She does not look particularly happy or keen to support this initiative. There are a myriad different reasons for this, most of which are entirely innocent.
But the fact that Ms Middleton has gone effectively AWOL for so long, is a bit weird, given the rather disturbing trend we are seeing of global elites “getting disappeared” of late.
It could, of course, be that Ms Middleton is simply recovering from a particularly bad curry – it IS PommieBastardLande, after all, and they HAVE allowed the Sceptred Isle to be overrun by their former subjects. It may well be that the Palace will soon release a photo showing the Princess entirely alive and well, and all will be as it was.
Oh, wait, actually, they DID do so, just today, in fact:
Well there we are, then. That settles it.
1 Comment
Curious, but do you know what’s really curious? The British Royal Family is one of the few in Europe to escape dispossession and/or regicide…I wonder what kind of bargain they made to avoid that fate and with whom…I’ll give you hint, it may involve the kinsmen of one Epstein.