“We are Forerunners. Guardians of all that exists. The roots of the Galaxy have grown deep under our careful tending. Where there is life, the wisdom of our countless generations has saturated the soil. Our strength is a luminous sun, towards which all intelligence blossoms… And the impervious shelter, beneath which it has prospered.”

Friday T&A: Up the Irons Edition

by | Jul 1, 2023 | fat girl jihad | 3 comments

This week has been a symbolic one, for a great many reasons. The (Khlearly Khatastrophic) Khreat Khokholite Khumvee Khounteroffensive has gone straight from blitzkrieg to BLYADskrieg in the space of a month, which literally anyone who was actually paying attention, could have predicted would happen. The West’s economy continues to unravel and implode. Western leaders continue to live in blissful denial of reality.

And I went to see the almighty IRON MAIDEN play live.

For me, this was a moment of real reflection. The last big concert that I went to, was IRON MAIDEN playing in Brooklyn, back in July 2017. In March 2018, I lost my job in the US, and by early June, I left for, as it now seems, good.

In the intervening six years, I have not seen ONE actual metal concert. God only knows how many bands I have missed – including, but not limited to, both IRON MAIDEN and POWERWOLF, both of which passed through where I live over the last several years.

Moreover, through all of the difficulty and strife of those intervening years, it was IRON MAIDEN’s music that often sustained me during the worst of it. So, when I got a chance to see them live on their latest tour, and they closed out with “Wasted Years”, just as they did when I saw them in 2017 – well… serious FEELZ, bro.

It was an amazing concert, I have to say. I don’t know what kind of voodoo hoodoo that he do, but Bruce Dickinson is, at 65 years old, more energetic and sprightly than men a THIRD his age. His voice is still there! I could not believe just how powerful and clear it still is. He did not show any tiredness or rust, at all.

The rest of the band were on fire too, especially considering that their oldest member is older than my DAD. Nicko McBrain has slowed down, significantly – you only need to listen to Rock in Rio to see by just how much – but his technicality and chops remain as sharp as ever. Steve Harris looks downright weird these days – sort of like he’s melting, almost – but his bass lines are still as thumpy and gallopy as ever.

The Three Amigos on guitars are every bit as sharp and capable as always. Each of them is a supremely talented and well practised musician – and, critically, each one has his own unique playing style, which is an amazing thing. You have to play an instrument yourself to understand just how difficult it is to find your own completely distinct playing style, which literally anyone can pick out immediately from all of the other guitarists out there.

Other guitar players can play faster, or more technically, or cram more notes into a solo than Adrian Smith, Dave Murray, or Janick Gers. But very, very few of them – Steve Morse and a handful of others come to mind – are so good, with such unique playing styles, that you can literally tell them apart based on a few notes.

It was a great, great night. I am, of course, paying a serious price – I am quite literally “gettin’ too old for this shit” – and my voice is shot to pieces, so anyone expecting my dulcet tones on a podcast or Domain Query episode this weekend will have to deal with crushing disappointment, but I will be back to normal shortly.

All of this comes with the sobering realisation that IRON MAIDEN will not be around for very much longer. They played a song that has literally NEVER been played live before this tour – “Alexander the Great”, a song that we fans have waited THIRTY FIVE YEARS to hear live – but they did it this time. And, as awesome as that moment was, it brought home, hard, the sad realisation that these guys are getting old.

One day, they will leave us. The band will dissolve, and they will go the way of all other legendary bands in the hearts and minds of their fans. I hope and pray that day is a long way off.

In the meantime – UP THE IRONS!

And now let’s get to the real entertainment for today.

This week’s lovely lady is Isabella Leeb, age 21 from Graz, Austria. She claims to be a physiotherapy student with a minor in modelling, currently living in New York, Amerikhastan, as well as Krautland – though, given her Patreon page, I am guessing there is a minor in thottery somewhere in the mix too.

Happy weekend, all – especially to my heathen rebel colonist friends, who will be celebrating their secession from the lawful and Godly authority of the Crown next week. (I cannot bring myself to say, “the King”, because the current doofus is simply too absurd. But I remain essentially a monarchist at heart.)

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  1. Tom Kratman

    You know why we rebelled? Almost no one does.

    There was essentially nothing that couldn’t have been worked through and most of it, officially, was. For that matter, as kings go, George was a good king. We object to quartering troops on the populace? Fine, Parliament makes it illegal to quarter troops on the populace here, uniquely in the British Empire. We object to certain taxes? Fine, Parliament revokes those taxes while trying, weakly, to preserve the principle that they can tax us.

    They didn’t want a war any more than we did.

    The problem was the British Army, which was out of control here. Despite what Parliament said, they DID quarter troops on the populace and they did try to disarm us, at Lexington and Concord, but even before that in Boston.

  2. Chris

    The amazing thing is a bunch of well-heeled British aristocrats got all pissy over a 5% tax, and even that may be overstated. “LIBERTY OR DEATH!!” Over a tax that as has been pointed out, could have been worked out. Today it’s anywhere from 20% to 40% or more depending on your income. Why haven’t we revolted over those higher taxes today? (It’s a rhetorical question)

  3. Tom Kratman

    Wasn’t really the tax, Chris, but the principle. We were either Englishmen, with the rights of Englishmen, to include the right to tax ourselves – and note, here, that when we were asked for money to support the French and Indian War we invariably gave more than we were asked for – or we were not Englishmen and owed no duty to the crown.

    Moreover, what reason to believe that the tax would have stopped at 5%, or any percent short of the confiscatory, had we not risen in arms?


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