Back when I was part of the system, this statement landed several jobs.

I have to admit, I have almost no networking skills when it comes to face to face communication in a more artificial situations. You know, those places with nice drinks, fake smiles and pretentious compliments. I tip my hat to any introvert who can pull this off.

It is a learned skill. I’m no good at it either. Most introverts despise the “fakeness” of it all and that stops us from engaging in these events. This is unfortunate, because there is no doubt or question that networking is THE most effective way of getting what you want out of people.

My advice is to start by finding some small aspect of someone’s dress or personality that catches your eye, and speak about that – with absolute sincerity. Say you are at a networking event where you see someone wearing a tie that you like. Tell him that you like his tie, ask him where he bought it, and how long he’s had it. Segue from there into conversations about his work and what he does. People LOVE to talk about themselves, so use that.

This is everywhere. Church, government forums, blog comments, LinkedIn, and in-person business. Probably a reflection of a short attention span and a need for attention to be reflected from the presenter. The moon glows from the sun after all.

You are right. It is endemic in our Western culture these days. In this respect, Eastern culture does a much better job of stopping the glory-hounds from jumping up to grab their share of the attention. It’s one of the few areas where I think that East Asians have a better sense of how to keep a kind of social order without excessive virtue signalling.

That book from Susan Cain changed my whole outlook on life when I read it. It was the most comforting thing to read at a time when I did not know much about the raw aspect of personality, that I can’t change and yet I get judged for that all the time. Most annoying of all, are the extroverts who never get it. It’s always ‘rah rah rah, let’s go’, when in reality the whole world needs to slow down, exhale and consider things.

I have to admit, I have almost no networking skills when it comes to face to face communication in a more artificial situations. You know, those places with nice drinks, fake smiles and pretentious compliments. I tip my hat to any introvert who can pull this off.

Introverts will probably remain a mystery to the rest of the world.

Now, she always precedes her questions with a lot of rambling gushing guff about how great the speakers were.”

This is constant right now, and it is not exclusively women. It’s like a rush to virtue signal that:
A. The person paid attention
B. It’s always directed at how well the person presented and how great the information was.
C. It will never have any indication of the information making an impact to the individual, eg, ‘Your point on how sharp widgets cut better than dull widgets will change how I approach my restaurant customers’

This is everywhere. Church, government forums, blog comments, LinkedIn, and in-person business. Probably a reflection of a short attention span and a need for attention to be reflected from the presenter. The moon glows from the sun after all.

I am a salesman. I am an introvert. You are correct on all counts.
Both book recommendations are correct. Good essay. I, for one, have room to improve on the ‘do your homework’ aspect of my work and this is a good reminder.