I formerly belonged to a church that had a men’s group. We met once a month for an hour at a Chick Fil-A. I was the only member there under 60. They did do some projects and things, but all of the meetings and work were done during the work week. It was next to impossible for a working man with a family to participate. That’s the problem.

Yeah, that one worked. Stupid JetPack comments system borked things up pretty good – I went back in and unFUBARd them.

Nearly every Christian church will have a men’s club of some sort. I’m Catholic, so I’m a Knight of Columbus, as well as a Men’s club member.

I joined the KofC when I moved down here and realized I needed to meet other men such as myself.

I have more brothers that care about me deeper than any friends I’ve met through work or in my neighborhood.

May the peace and grace of Christ be with you, brother. I am most grateful for your support and pray for your good health and your success. I am also deeply sorry to see what you have gone through. I have received stories from a number of readers and friends about these hard times that they are going through, and every single one has been tested to, and sometimes beyond, the breaking point. Honestly, your challenges make mine look trivial by comparison.

I will do all that I can to provide hope, inspiration, and support to you and others who derive value from my work. I will be sending out newsletters and emails over the coming days with this goal in mind.

I want to take this opportunity to thank you for the inspiration and support that you have given me, even though we have never met. Your site's previous incarnation, Didact's Reach, has helped me get through a rough year, and I like the new one even better, as it runs that much more smoothly. I'm speaking as someone who has had some challenges this year [breakup of 22-year marriage, homelessness, someone I loved being VERY ill with the Kung Flu, etc], you have provided inspiration and support. I have signed up for the newsletter, and will be looking forward to receiving it. Pray forgive this being a day late, but I didn't have a chance to check in yesterday.


Regards,
OS/2Tech

Truth be told, none of us would be hanging around this blog if we had a gaggle of real world friends to help and be helped. I think if we solve this problem, the others fall like dominoes.

I agree entirely. With the Coof and the need (for now) to preserve anonymity, though, there is no way to get around this for the moment.

One possible solution is to hold online fora through Zoom and other platforms. That is something that I will have to consider, though maintaining anonymity would be difficult, to say the least.

I think the root of the problem for most of us is not being able to easily find other men in meatspace, beit groups or one-on-one. Truth be told, none of us would be hanging around this blog if we had a gaggle of real world friends to help and be helped. I think if we solve this problem, the others fall like dominoes.

Your son NEEDS a real warning from men that he respects and honours, and he needs it fast. This is definitely one of those situations where counsel from you and your friend will be useful. You can provide him with advice from the perspective of fatherly love and affection as his role model. Your friend can do so by providing an understanding of what life looks like before and after a divorce.

I can tell you that this story probably will not end well. I have been through similar relationships myself, and I have seen one of my friends break his own family apart by marrying a woman that his friends and his mother absolutely hated. When a man is blinded by the extraordinary seductive power of the Mighty V – and it IS mighty, for sure – then nothing short of Divine intercession can stop him.

And intensive and focused prayer is of course a must in this case.

I have a big one I need to email you about anyhow. Your experience in IT may be helpful.

But I have one that’s good for the viewership.

My son has himself in the clutches of a wall smash woman who is lining him up to be a beta provider. She’s a few years older. When I first met her, I though “Man, this one his careening into the wall at ramming speed with a fat grenade in her hand. And I think she’s pulled the pin”.

Didn’t help that when my wife asked what I thought, that’s exactly what I told her.

He’s had all kind of trouble, and for the most part has been asking his mom advice. At one point, we were out on the patio as he was asking her how to deal with the latest drama. I leaned back and quipped – “It’s a shit test. The only test you fail by doing what’s asked. The solution here is to ghost her”. I had been…uh…celebrating…Ah, screw it, I was hammered.

Dude has yet to talk to me much about her.

The women in our family hate this chick. Their intensity varies from my wife’s grace and southern charm, being nice enough yet trying to guide her son away from the rocks, to my oldest daughter who viscerally hates the woman. So much so she’s told him to never bring her to their house again. Both daughter’s have been quite candid about their feelings to him. That in itself is a bad sign.

I did get him to open up over a few bottles of wine the other weekend. I told him that at this stage in the relationship (a year or so) they should be on cloud nine, attached at the hip. Not with him seeking pro counselling. That’s where couples get to after years of marriage. I said she reminded me of women two of my friends (Whom he’s met) married, only to suffer profound misery. The woman, although nominally our faith (doesn’t practice), is pulling him away from his.

So I gotta do something but it needs a light touch. He’s like me.

As I type this, I’m feeling divine intervention. I have a divorced friend from Church. Almost a brother to me. I should call him and arrange a guys weekend. My son knows him and likes him. A pig hunt, maybe. Kid’s never hunted (A failing on my part).

Whadder’yer think?

BTW – I had a better post, but the captcha fisted me and blew it out